


Earthquake

by winchestergirl



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-14
Updated: 2010-07-15
Packaged: 2017-10-30 02:43:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/326886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winchestergirl/pseuds/winchestergirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen have finally settled into their new life after the drama of the kidnapping of their son. Jared has gone back to acting and is working on a new movie. But what happens to their family when Jared is caught in the rubble of a building collapse due to an earthquake that happens on set. Can they move forward from the disaster, or are there just some things you can’t get past?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Fic title:** Earthquake  
 **Author name:** [](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/profile)[**winchesterxgirl**](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/)  
 **Artist name:** [](http://alena2b.livejournal.com/profile)[**alena2b**](http://alena2b.livejournal.com/)  
 **Genre:** RPS  
 **Pairing:** Jared/Jensen  
 **Rating:** NC17  
 **Word count:** 27,548  
 **Warnings/Spoilers:** Although my story deals with an earthquake please be assured it has nothing to do with Haiti or any other recent events. This fic was started originally for last year's bigbang and follows on from [Mad World](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/118806.html) my 2008 bigbang fic.  
 **Summary:** Jared and Jensen have finally settled into their new life after the drama of the kidnapping of their son. Jared has gone back to acting and is working on a new movie. But what happens to their family when Jared is caught in the rubble of a building collapse due to an earthquake that happens on set. Can they move forward from the disaster, or are there just some things you can’t get past?

  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)   


 

Part One

  
  


  


“Last scene for the day people,” The director called out, voice carrying across the set. “Let’s see if we can’t wrap it up this time.”  
 

 

Jared walked wearily back to the set, his boots dragging a little with each step. It had been another long exhausting day and he was beginning to feel the punishing pace of life on the set more acutely now he was back at work.  
 

 

His day started early, makeup and hair at oh dark hundred and he was finally coming to the realization that juggling a baby of twenty months and a career wasn’t going to be as easy as he’d first thought. Davey wasn’t the problem...well; okay he was a little bit. He did tend to wear him out a lot and Jared often wondered if he’d been as energetic at the same age. If he had…well he thinks he owes his momma years of flowers and gifts for surviving him. It’s mostly the hours though.The long periods between takes with nothing to do, and then the frantic pace of nailing the scene before they lose the light are a killer. For some reason he’d never felt the same sense of relief of ‘another day over’ before when he was filming Supernatural. It had to be this project, it just feels like it’s lacking in something vital. He can’t put his finger on it exactly it’s just a vibe he gets, more than likely from the new location than any real problem.

 

Jared took a deep breath and pressed forward through the doors of the old hospital where they were filming. As he walked along the abandoned halls, it brought back fond but creepy memories of filming at Riverview in Vancouver. He thinks that Linda Vista might just be that little creepier though, there are cabinets still filled with blood samples here and rooms full of records of past patients, not to mention the morgue still set up as if it was only used yesterday.

 

“Hey!”

 

Jared jumped at the sound of Jensen’s voice echoing along the hallway. “Jensen?” He turns to see Jensen emerging from the dim lit corridor, “What are you doing here? I didn’t think you were done on set till the end of the week.” Jared smiles at first, all warmth and happiness, glad to see him back so soon, but it rapidly fades thanks to the glare Jensen aims at him.  
 

 

“Why isn’t Davey at home? Jared. After everything we went through because of AJ, I thought we’d agreed to keep him out of the media spotlight—at home and safe.”  
 

 

Jared can hear the unspoken emphasis on the word ‘safe’. “He **_is_** safe Jen.There’s no media here, set visits were yesterday, Julie is with him in the trailer, **_and_** he’s down for his nap. He should be awake again in about an hour. He’s been doted on by all the girls on set and hasn’t been out my sight all day.” As much as he doesn’t want it to, Jared can hear his tone rise in frustration.“I’ve got Clif here with me on set, and you know what he’s like. No one will get within two feet while he’s around. He’s SAFE, Jen. Honest.”  
 

 

“This **_place_** is not safe Jared. Riverview wasn’t safe and this place is worse,” Jensen kicked at the crumbling wall beside him then coughed at the dust that rose up. "It doesn't matter.I'm taking him home and that's where he's staying from now on--home."  
 

 

"With Julie," Jared snapped, “the nanny. That's great. Let him grow up without a parent in sight."  
 

Jensen was walking away but Jared grabbed his arm to stop him."It was one thing when he was tiny, but he's old enough to know us now, old enough to know when we're not around."  
 

"Guess you should have thought of that before you took this job. I thought---"  
 

Something in Jensen's eyes made him believe this was about more than just Davey.  
 

"You thought what?"  
 

 

Jensen yanked away from his grasp, “Never mind."  
 

 

"No, don’t tell me ‘never mind’!" Jared flinched at the sound of his own voice. He glanced around and saw so many eyes on him. Damn.This time when he grabbed Jensen's arm he pulled him out into the hall and around the corner to the privacy of an empty room.The stench of urine and the moldering mattress in the corner along with rotting trash surrounded them.Nauseated, Jared wanted to leave go somewhere else but he knew Jensen's patience was wearing thin."I know what you thought," he lowered his voice."You thought I was going to play house husband and I know that's what we agreed when we decided to have Davey, but Jesus, Jen; I don't know how our mothers did it.I feel …adrift, lost."  
 

 

Jensen pulled a face and that did it.All bets off.  
 

"You know Davey is as much my son as he is yours," Jared shouted louder than ever, toe-to-toe and towering over Jensen."As a matter of fact, he's more mine than yours because I'm the one who fed him and bathed him and changed him while you were off making movies."  
 

 

"Hey!"  
 

 

"It's the truth," Jared shot back, stampeding right over Jensen's protests."And you know what else? The truth is-- you’re selfish.This isn't about what's best for Davey.This is about me not working so you can have someone to serve you dinner and give you back rubs after your _long day_."  
 

 

"Christ you sound like a girl!"  
 

 

"I'm not giving up this movie—do you get it? And _as long_ as I'm working on this movie Davey will be coming to the set so I can see him, play with him, and let him know that I care enough to do more than just kiss him on the forehead in the middle of the night when he's sound asleep."  
 

 

"Are you kidding me?"The muscles in his jaw begin to shake he clenched his teeth so hard.He drew in a deep breath through his nose, and then exhaled the same way almost as if he feared opening his mouth. He took another breath and then he spoke, the words, precise and dangerous, in a low tone."I nearly went insane when that bastard took him.I was sick to my stomach with worry and now you’re going to stand there and say that I don't give a damn? That I don't **_love him_** as much as you do?"  


  


The pain in his words decimated what remained of Jared’s anger.He shifted his weight to one hip shoulders slumping forward.Suddenly he didn't feel so big despite being inches taller. "I didn't mean--"  
 

 

"Fuck you," Jensen cut him off."Stay here. Make your movie. I'm taking Davey home with me. Hopefully he won't freak out, since according to you, he doesn't even know who I am." He spun and stormed out of the room the conversation done as far as he was concerned.  
 

 

Jared started after him down the hall, wanting nothing more than to make him understand, but the sudden squelch and static hiss of a nearby radio interrupted his headlong flight.  
 

 _“We need_ Jared on set, please.”  
  


 

Damn it, he thought as he watched Jensen slam his way through the door to the stairwell.He stood running his fingers through his hair in frustration as the hollow metallic sound echoed in his ears, until one of the PAs came to escort him back to set.  
 

 

Yeah, Jared thought, it’s so damn nice to know I’m needed.

 

oo

ooo000ooo

/p>

 

Storming out of the building, Jensen ground his teeth as his mind shifted through snippets of the accusations Jared had thrown at him.  
 

 

_You’re selfish…_

__

 

_I care enough to do more than just kiss him on the forehead in the middle of the night when he's sound asleep…_

__

 

Oh yeah, and then there was the real kicker.  
 

 

_He's more mine than yours…_

__

 

Now that one had wounded him deeper than he wanted to admit. Like a kick to the groin the ache settled deep inside him in a place he wasn’t sure would ever heal.  
 

 

Blinding sunlight startled him out of his dark thoughts as he left the building.. Squinting, he scanned the chaotic mix of trailers that lined the outer edges of the set, belonging to various departments, actors, and crew in search of the one where his son would be.  
 

 

As he moved forward, he was pleased to see Clif leaning casually against the exterior wall of one of the trailers. At six-five, weighing in at over 300 pounds of muscle he’d be more at home in a biker bar along with a couple dozen Hell’s Angels. Clif was worth every cent they paid him, he thought. Heading over, Jensen greeted him with a tight smile and avoided the curious look the older man shot him as he headed up the stairs and through the door in search of Davey.  
 

 

“Hey, Jensen,” Julie whispered as he entered the trailer. She was propped up on the couch watching Days of our Lives on mute, Davey curled in her lap slumbering peacefully.  
 

 

“We were watching the Wiggles, but the little guy had too much excitement this morning and flaked out about twenty minutes ago,” she kept her voice low as she stroked her fingers through his mussed hair.  
 

 

Jensen nodded, still distracted by his earlier argument with Jared as he crossed the trailer and crouched down to caress his son’s soft round cheek. “Hey, little man.” He whispered, emotions swirling inside him at the memory of just how close they’d come to losing him surfaced.  
 

To his surprise, just watching his son wasn’t enough anymore and he settled down next to Julie, scooping Davey up into a tight embrace in one smooth movement. Davey stirred but didn’t wake, and Jensen felt some of his tension drain away as he inhaled the comforting scent of baby shampoo, powder, and cookies.  
 

 

“Are you okay?” Julie questioned, worry clear in her expression as he lifted his head to meet her gaze.  
 

He realized as she studied him curiously that he must have been sitting there for longer than he’d thought without saying a word. She was sitting on the edge of the couch now, the television off. Despite being younger than both Jared and Jensen, Julie, with her heart-shaped face, soft brown hair and deep soulful eyes, had a distinct motherly vibe about her that always seemed to con Jensen into telling her more than he intended.  
 

 

“Jared and I had a fight,” he confessed. “He thinks…” he shook his head and huffed softly. “You know what…It doesn’t matter.” He stood Davey still cradled in his arms. “We’re heading home now. I don’t want Davey here on set where someone could get to him and I don’t give a damn what Jared thinks. I’m---”  
 

 

Anything further he was about to say was a moot point when the trailer began to vibrate violently and then swayed as he stumbled the back of his knees hitting the couch. “What the hell?” he growled as the ear-bleeding shriek of what sounded like an express train filled the air. The trailer continued to bounce and sway violently as he clutched Davey to his chest, struggling to keep both of them on the couch and away from the random items now tumbling from cupboards and shelves around the trailer.  
 

 

“Hush, it’s okay, baby,” Jensen tried to soothed Davey burying his face in Davey’s silky hair as his son refused to settle, squirming and wriggling to be free. He slid down from the couch and crawled across the floor toward the door Davey clutched to his chest with one arm.  
 

He remembered hearing it was safer to be in a doorway during a quake, but he couldn’t remember now for the life of him if it applied to trailers too. The trailer continued to shake then suddenly everything went quiet. Well, except for the car alarms. Every car in the vicinity equipped with one was going off and the noise was just as deafening as the quake.

“Julie?” he glanced over to where she’d been standing moments before only to find he couldn’t see her at all. “Julie?”  
 

 

“I’m okay, Jensen,” she called from where she hunched against the sofa arm. “How’s Davey?”  
 

“He’s good. Scared, but okay. Are you hurt—?”  
 

 

Julie raised her hand to touch her forehead where it had begun to throb, “Ouch. Remind me to never stand beneath a cupboard that has heavy things stored inside.”  
 

“Jensen! Julie! You okay?” Clif’s pounded at the door, seconds before his large frame loomed in the doorway. He offered Julie his hand, helping her from the floor, and then gently wiped at the blood above her eye.  
 

 

Jensen stood up slowly as he checked Davey for any sign of injury. “We’re good man, we’re okay.” He clutched his son tight against his chest and kissed the top of his head. “Shit. We haven’t had a quake like that in a long time. Gotta say, I miss Vancouver, dude… never would‘ve got one there like this.”  
 

 

No sooner were the words out of Jensen’s mouth, a loud creaking and groaning echoed through the trailer. All three looked around nervously, and then headed for the front door of the trailer the ground beneath them shuddering in protest followed by a deafening explosion.  
 

 

Jensen watched in detached horror and disbelief through the trailer door at the scene unfolding in slow motion as a section of the abandoned hospital collapsed before his eyes. The section **_Jared_** had entered only minutes before. Oh, God, he thought, eyes rolled in a panic as he thrust Davey toward Julie and turned almost colliding with Clif in his mad rush to get through the door. “Jared,” he choked out through a tight throat.  
 

 

Clif turned to look at the wreckage behind him before he grabbed Jensen’s arm in an attempt to stop him from fleeing the trailer. “Jensen, it’s not safe!”  
 

 

He wrenched his arm from Clif’s tenuous hold and jumped the stairs, heading across the lot. “IT’S JARED!” He yelled over his shoulder. “Are you coming or not?”  
 

 

As he neared the building, his heart began beating faster, and he felt like he was running through molasses. The walls had collapsed, a cloud of dust so thick filled the air, stinging his eyes, and filling his lungs until he could barely breathe. Around him the set was in chaos, people running and screaming and all he could think of was…  
 

 

_Jared_ _._

__

 

_Oh, god._

 

ooo000ooo

 

 

 

Jensen reached what had been the open doorway just moments before. Now, there was nothing but a solid wall of rubble. Coughing he began to tear at the bricks, mortar and twisted metal, fingers scrabbling to find purchase on something, anything that would tear free from the wreckage. He had to get Jared out of there. Hands bleeding he continued to claw at what blocked him from the ‘one’ thing other than their son that gave his life meaning. Nails torn he began sobbing, his lungs aching with his effort to breathe through the concrete dust and the fear that he would never see Jared again.  
 

His brain suddenly snapped into logical mode, processing everything around him. This was no time for deep revelations; this was the time for panic, illogical feats of strength and trying to save Jared. Tearing at rubble and fighting to--what exactly? He took a deep breath. He had nothing but his hands, nothing to pry concrete and metal bars away from this disastrous mess.Behind him the piercing wail of sirens cut through the air, vibrating through his skull as Clif’s hand settled on his shoulder.  
 

 

“Jensen.” Fingers flexing, Clif squeezed his shoulder. “Jensen, come on man, police, paramedics, the whole shebang are here ready to get him out. Get THEM out.” Clif forced him to turn around snapping him out of the shock he was slipping into. “Jensen!”  
 

 

It took him a moment to process Clif’s words and when he did the horror settled in sharp and bitter. THEM. Oh god. It wasn’t _just_ Jared in there. Members of crew that had been setting up the next scene, the cameraman, and the boom guy were down there with him too. Jensen ran one hand through the short strands of his hair, leaving a smear of blood and concrete dust across his face as he nodded, allowing Clif to pull him away as Search and Rescue began bringing in the heavy equipment.  
 

 

God, everything was fucked, he thought. Jared and the others weretrapped, maybe dead, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do.

 

ooo000ooo

 

Throbbing pain, thick dust filling his lungs, eyes, and his throat; these were the first sensations that Jared felt. Then the noises came--muffled and indistinct. Crying, soft crying beside him, just to his left somewhere. Jared tried to lift his head to see where it was coming from; but all he could see was the air heavy with dust swirling above him through the dim light. He dropped his head back down, a wave of nausea threatening to overwhelm him—just great.  
  
  
Okay, mental check, he thought. Well, he was awake and thinking, so he wasn’t dead like he thought during that time in Africa when he’d overturned his vehicle. Check, not dead...so no need to call the studio. He tried to move his fingers, discovering with a glint of gratitude that he could lift his arms and wriggle his fingers before his eyes. Okay, another hurdle cleared. The sobs began to soften and he tried to sit up, searching for the source, but after shifting a few inches his ribs screamed. The pain overwhelmed any chance at a clear thought he might have as if someone were driving knives in between each one of them. He fell back, taking shallow breaths. “Damn it…shit. That’s not good.”  
 

 

“Jared?” a pain-filled voice spoke up from the shadows, but the Texas in it was still strong, “That you?” Another sob, followed by a pained groan, echoed through the small space.  
 

The boom guy, Danny, he thought, and his link to Texas on the set, “Danny? Oh, man, am I glad to hear your voice, buddy—you okay? Where’s Pete? What happened?”  
 

 

Danny coughed, more dust clogging the air as another section of wall crumbled nearby. “Just a sec man,” he coughed the sound wet, “one question at a time, man.”

The horrible wet sound of Danny’s breathing terrified Jared, “Okay,” he lowered his voice and slowed the pace. “Take your time it’s gonna be okay. _We’re_ gonna be okay.”  
 

 

“Only if you…” Danny groaned, “Get the number of the bus that landed on top of me.” He panted; the exertion from speaking straining his voice. He went silent and Jared was beginning to think he’d passed out from the pain when he added. “Pete was beside me with the camera. Can you… can you see him?”  
 

 

Jared tried to turn his head but the rubble from the floor above him obscured his view. The floor he was standing on only moments ago. That meant they were down in the morgue. Yeah, that wasn’t at all disturbing. “No, I can’t see anyone Can you move?”  
 

Danny coughed again, the sound causing Jared to wince. With each passing second, Danny sounded worse. “No, I’m sort of stuck under a ton of rubble.” Another wet rasping cough echoed around them, and then “You?”  
 

Jared shook his head, forgetting for a moment that Danny couldn’t see him. “No.” He tried to push at the section of pillar that had fallen across his legs, but it was futile. “I’m pinned, too.” He took a deep breath fighting the wave of pain in his ribs, and used all the energy he could summon, “HELP! Down here!”he screamed as bits of concrete and dust fell around them from the vibration of his voice, as Jared strained to hear a voice, anything that would indicate that ‘someone’ had heard his cry. All he could hear was the faint creak and groan of the building as it shifted on its unstable foundation.

 

  


                                                                   

ooo000ooo

 

 

“Get that equipment over here!” the leader of the search and rescue team barked. “We have at least three possibly more trapped in there and this wall isn’t going to stand forever.”  
 

 

Jensen paced along the edge of the cordoned area as if he were a caged tiger. The response of the LAPD and the rescue crews was immediate and despite his pleas, they’d firmly told him to stay back in the safety zone. Now his thoughts altered between ignoring their warnings and joining the rescue effort to realizing he’d just be a hindrance even if he made it in.  
 

“What’s taking so long? Damn it, Clif!” His head was throbbing and he was finding it more difficult to breathe as the minutes ticked by. He threw his hands up in frustration and glared in Clif’s direction. “Why the fuck did we have that stupid fight? Why?” And what the hell are they doing down there?”    
  


 

“Trying to get them out, man, what the hell do you think they’re doing?” Clif wrapped one huge arm around Jensen’s shoulder and steered him toward the makeshift command post that had been the director’s tent. “You need to just calm down, have a seat, and stay out of the way. You’re only going to make things harder if you hover like some damn helicopter mom over her kid’s first day at school. The last thing those folks out there need is any distraction from the job their here to do.”  
 

 

“I’m not hovering,” Jensen broke off at Clif’s raised eyebrow and sighed. “Okay, I guess I am, but that’s Jared down there and we left things--” He rubbed his hand over his mouth, a nervous habit he’d picked up from Dean’s character during Supernatural, “we left things bad. We both said shit we didn’t mean and now if he doesn’t make it out…” He took a deep breath, “what if they’re the last words we ever have?”  
 

 

“He’ll make it out.” Clif reassured. “It’s only one section, not the whole building, so they have a better chance of finding him and getting him out in time. I know that doesn’t sound comforting but believe me it’s better than if the whole building had collapsed.”  
 

 

Jensen turned with a start as voices raised, voices barking what sounded like orders, and crew began running toward a specific area of the collapse. Stepping from the tent, Jensen grabbed a passing officer, his dark uniform covered in a thick layer of dust. “What’s going on?” he demanded.  
 

 

“We’ve got signs of life. Faint but we’ve got ‘em. Rescue is putting paramedics on stand-by. They have at least two maybe three voices. .”  
 

 

He turned back to Clif and noticed that KyeWeston the director had joined them “Three? I thought there were more down there?” Jensen watched as the activity stepped up a notch.  
 

 

“No, Jared was just finishing the shot we needed in the hallway. There was him, Danny and Pete on the camera. We’d got all we needed earlier. They were just getting the last angle we needed before we broke for lunch.” The ring of Kye’s cell phone pierced the relative silence of the tent, loud even over the noise of the machinery and he grimaced as he checked the Caller ID. “Shit! That’s all I need.” Kye walked away, mumbling something incoherent in the phone as a cheer rose from the collapse site.  
 

 

“We found one!”  
 

 

All Jensen could think was, _Is it Jared?_

 

                                                                             

ooo000ooo

  


[Part Two](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/198283.html)

  



	2. Chapter 2

 

 

 

[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  


Part Two   


 

 

“Jared…Jared?”

 

His eyes drifted open slowly only to meet with the same dusty air as before, making it hard to see too far in front of his face. He must have passed out after calling for help. He had no idea how long they’d been down there or how long he’d been out for. Danny’s voice was thin, weaker, and Jared knew he had to be in worse shape than either of them wanted to admit.

 

“Yeah? Danny, I’m here. I’m still here man.”

 

“Dude, I thought you’d checked out on me. I think I heard voices but…” He wheezed trying to continue. “My voice isn’t that strong. I can’t call out.”

 

“It’s alright man I can do it. Danny, I got it. I’ll do it man.” Jared took another breath. Barely enough to fill his lungs before the stabbing pain was back and he screamed as loud as he could, “HELP! We’re down here! HELP!”   
 

Above them he could hear what sounded like movement followed by the welcome sound of rescue workers as they broke through the rubble. Jared sighed in relief as he saw a face covered in a filter mask, dark eyes lighting up when they met his. He was sure if he could see the lower half of the man’s face he would have been grinning from ear to ear.

 

His voice, although muffled by the mask, was clear as a bell to Jared. “I can see two of them, but there’s no sign of the third one. Lower me down.” He pulled away and Jared wanted to cry, but then he reappeared, feet first, as his body began lowering down through the opening. Inch by inch he moved closer until his booted feet settled just to the right of Jared. Squatting down, one gloved hand reaching out he brushed Jared’s hair from his face. “Hey, you ok? Can you hear me?”

 

“Yeah, I’m…” he winced. “I’m okay. I can’t move, my legs are pinned and it’s hard to breathe. I think I broke a rib or twelve.” Jared grabbed his wrist forcing him to look at him as he checked his pulse. “You have to check Danny first. I think he’s in a bad way. He’s sounding weaker and I can’t … you need to help him.”

 

The guy, _Jake_ according to his coveralls, nodded. “Okay, listen, _don’t_ move alright? You need to stay still in case you’ve done any damage to your spine. Just wait a minute, we’re going to get you out--”

 

“No! Danny needs to go first.”

 

Jake shifted carefully around Jared’s head to where Danny lay and winced at what he saw. A section of concrete had crushed Danny’s lower torso and he knew instinctively that he had little chance of getting out of this alive… A few feet from Danny the camera man lay, lifeless, head resting at an unnatural angle, his neck obviously broken. Jake shuddered as he sent a silent prayer heavenward that his death had been quick. He turned his attention back to Danny again. It was a wonder he was still breathing. He reached down and snapped the radio from his belt with one hand as he lifted Danny’s wrist with the other, checking for a pulse.

 

“How is he man?” Jared fought the darkness that crept into the edge of his vision; he wanted to know how Danny was before he gave in to the pain and shock.

 

“Unconscious, but alive,” Jake lifted the radio and opened up the channel with a flick of his finger. “I have three, visual confirmation, one DOA, massive trauma to the lower torso…” as he rambled on Jared began drifting, some of the words didn’t make sense and he suspected it was code. “Hey,” suddenly Jake was there again, kneeling over him. “Can you tell me your name, kid?”  
 

Jared nodded. “Jared…”  
 

“Okay, Jared, they’re lowering a backboard and basket through the hole. We’ll get you strapped all in and get you out in a jiffy.”

 

“No!” Jared snapped then his voice lowered again, “I’m not going before Danny does! I know he’s worse than me,” he hissed as his ribs throbbed. “He should go first.”

 

“Listen to me, son, he can’t. We have to get you out first so we can clear the rubble away that pinning him down before we can even think of getting him out.” He stood and moved below the opening and called up. “We need to lever this debris up might have room for one more down here.”   
 

A few seconds later, a second rescue worker was lowered down, equipment in hand. Jake turned back to kneel next to Jared.“Now I need you to help me by staying as still as you can while Katie and I lever this debris off your legs. Think you can do that, kid?”

 

Jared nodded in resignation, “Yeah, alright.”

 

He wasn’t happy about being ahead of Danny, but he didn’t want to make it any harder for them to get his buddy out either. Jake wedged a jack under the edge of the largest section of concrete, Katie following his directions as they worked in tandem to remove the worst of the debris careful not to shift anything. The last thing they needed was to bring everything down on their heads.  
 

It seemed like forever before Jake finally radioed up top, “Get that board and basket down here. Soon as we get him up, we’re going to need another set of hands down here. We have an unconscious man with weak vitals that needs immediate attention, and a casualty to bring to the surface. Site’s about as secure as we’re going to get it. ”

 

As soon as the basket lowered into the darkness, Jake and Katie went to work, caution in their every move. Katie moved down Jared’s body, assessing any visible damage with a keen eye and radioing the paramedics up top. When she reached his leg, he tried not to wince as she cut away his jeans carefully. “We have multiple fractures of the tibia and fibula including one compound fracture,” she transmitted voice calm as she opened her kit and started to pack material around his leg to cushion it from further damage. “This is going to hurt, sweetie, but I can’t splint it properly without doing more damage than good.” She smiled at Jared and reached out to clasp his hand. “Just hang in there—okay?”  
 

He blinked in response and licked his lips trying his best to remain as still as possible. The pain was excruciating, but the two things that made him hold on were the two most important things in his life—his baby boy and the man he loved. He knew Jensen hated him right now, but he refused to give in to the darkness just because of a stupid argument. Davey needed him.  
 

Jake slipped a rigid cervical collar around Jared’s neck and the two of them then slid the hard backboard beneath him, using lateral support devices to keep from shifting his spine. Once done, they threaded the straps around Jared’s body, securing him, the collar, and the lateral supports to the backboard. Together the two rescue workers then lifted him on the count of three into the basket.    
  


As they attached the ropes to the basket, Jake met Jared’s unfocused eyes, and cleared his throat. “Jared, I promise you we’ll do the best we can for your friend. You focus on staying with the paramedics when you get up there and we’ll take care of business down here. You got that, kid?” Jared mumbled uncertain of anything, but his fear for Danny, “Yeah...okay…promise.”

 

“You’ll be fine, son.” he brushed Jared’s hair from his face. “Okay, on three! One...two… three!” Slowly the basket moved upward and Jake called after Jared.“See you soon, kid!”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Stunning hues of red, pink and yellow filled the Los Angeles sky as the sun set, but Jensen could have cared less about the spectacular watercolor nature provided him with now, especially after the careless damage she had wrought earlier. They’d been waiting--no-- he’d been waiting for what seemed like forever, to find out whether the person they were bringing up was Jared or another member of the crew. He felt like an ass. He couldn’t even remember any of their names although Jared had filled him in at the end of every day on the events of each shoot. He couldn’t help wishing it would be Jared and not someone else. When a cheer went up a few moments later as the paramedics lifted the basket rose from hole Jensen rushed over to see who they were bringing to the surface.

 

Halogen work lights had been set up as the natural light began to wane, their intensity almost blinded Jared when the basket cleared the surface. His broken ribs were making it more difficult to breathe and his leg was just…nothing. He couldn’t feel anything, even though he _knew_ that it was broken. He’d seen the look on the faces of his rescuers when they got him free of the rubble, knew it wasn’t pretty. Hell, he’d been trapped beneath a ton of crap for hours for Christ’s sake. He squinted as his eyes began to adjust to the light, the shapes around him coalescing into faces; some familiar and others not.As the basket settled on the ground; the paramedics transferred him to a gurney before sending it back down for Danny.  
  
 

  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fx7gg/)   


 

 

“Jared… oh, God, I’m sorry… so sorry.” He felt his hand lifted, soft lips brushing against his knuckles and then Jensen’s face came into focus. “I didn’t mean it, Jay, fuck it was a stupid fight…” He tried to pull Jared’s hand closer, but Jared wrenched his hand away.

 

“Not now, Jensen.” The effort of talking alone sent another wave of pain through his side. _Was Jensen serious?_ He _wanted to make-up._ Danny was trapped still, possibly dying? What did he want? Tell him everything was going to be all right. Everything was as far from all right as possible and all Jensen wanted was make it all ‘better’?

 

“Jared?”   
 

There was a pleading look in Jensen’s eyes as one of the paramedics stepped between them. “I’m sorry, 

Mr. Ackles, we have to load him in the ambulance. Are you traveling with him?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“No,” Jared ground out. “He’s not.He’s taking our son home. Get me out of here.” He grimaced at the pain in his ribs avoiding Jensen’s shocked expression as they loaded the gurney in the ambulance. Making up could wait, no matter how hurt Jensen was by his refusal to let him ride to the hospital. Jared was relieved when the doors swung shut. Davey was what mattered most. He was going to need his Dad and it was Jensen’s turn to find out exactly what that meant.

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jensen rubbed his hand over the back of his neck, nerves prickling as he watched the ambulance drive away in disbelief. _What the fuck?_ He thought. Jared didn’t want him with him on the ride. Shit. They’d both had said things they didn’t mean in the heat of the moment, and he knew-- _he fucking knew--_ Jared was a wonderful father to Davey. So what made them tear at one another like that? Both of them determined to hurt the other with their words.

 

“Jensen?”   
 

From across the lot, Julie’s soft voice cut through his thoughts. He turned to see her approach with hesitation, Davey in her arms, his pale golden head tucked in against her neck, thumb resting on his plump bottom lip as he sucked it in his sleep. “He’s had it for the day. Do you want me to take him home while you go to the hospital with Jared?”

 

Jensen held his arms out for Davey with a shake of his head. “No, thanks Julie, you’ve been great today but I think I need to take him home. For some reason Jared doesn’t want me there, but we’re going to see him at the hospital as soon as I get us both a change of clothes. We’ll probably sleep at the hospital tonight if they let us.”

 

“Okay, if you’re sure. Remember, you can call me any time you need me okay?”

 

Using his free hand as he shifted Davey into the crook of his elbow, he flashed the Boy Scout sign, “Scouts honor.”

 

Julie offered him an amused smile, “From what I hear you were never a Boy Scout, Jensen.”

 

“No, but I modeled a scout’s uniform in a catalog once as a kid, does that count?”

 

“Not really, but it was a good try. Good night, Jensen, and please, let me know how Jared’s doing as soon as you find out-- okay?”

 

“Of, course,” Holding Davey close he headed for his car. “Come on, baby boy. Let’s get you home, clean you up, and then we’ll go see Daddy.”

 

ooo000ooo

  
[Part Three](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/198433.html)   
  



	3. Earthquake

  


[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  
Part Three

“My name is JensenAckles; I’m here to see JaredPadalecki. They brought him in from the ‘quake collapse at LindaVista—”

 

“Are you a relative, sir?”

 

“He’s my partner, he’s—”

 

“I’m sorry, sir, only immediate family—”  
  


“You don’t understand, he’s my son’s father, _my husband_ if it wasn’t for that damn prop 8.” The frustration of the day was beginning to boil up as he tried to make her understand, shifting Davey a little higher on his hip.

 

Her eyes filled with sympathy as she realized what he was trying to explain. “I’m sorry, sir, all I can say is he’s in surgery at the moment until his immediate family is notified. According to HIPAAif you want further information you’ll have to access it through them.”

 

As he realized he had no legal right to any information about Jared’s condition, Jensen’s face grew dark with anger. _If only we still lived in Canada,_ he thought. _“_ But he’s my—”

 

“Sir, I _do_ understand, but my hands are legally tied until I get permission from his family to divulge private information.” She paused then looked around her voice dropping to a whisper. “There’s nothing I can tell you at the moment anyway, but as soon as I hear anything I’ll see what I can do.” Raising her voice again she added, “I suggest you contact his family and we can go from there.”

 

Thankful for her small gesture of kindness, Jensen nodded, jaw clenched so tight the muscles twitched and headed to the private waiting room Davey cradled in his arms.He’d wanted to avoid making this call, hoping things wouldn’t be this bad. Settling into a chair, his son braced against shoulder, he pulled out his phone, and scrolled through the numbers. He took a deep breath before he hit dial and waited for it to connect. He prayed it wouldn’t be Jared’s mom who answered.

 

“Hello?”

 

 _Great_ , he thought. He’d gotten Jared’s mom after all. It wasn’t that he was scared of her or even disliked her. He loved her as if she were his own mom, but the last thing he’d wanted was to be the one to break this horrible news. Making the call made it too real. _Shit. Fucking universe_ , he cursed silently. “Hello Sherri, its Jensen…” he inhaled his eyes tearing up. “There’s been an accident.”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jared’s parents arrived on the next flight. Jensen had called Julie, asking her to pick them up from the airport, fill them in on what little he’d been able to find out, and then drop them at the hospital. As he watched through the window, they approached the nurse’s station and the nurse he'd spoke to earlier redirected to the waiting room. He was still waiting to hear if Jared was out of surgery and he’d almost worn a path in the floor.

 

“Jensen.” Gerry held out his hand to Jensen and when he accepted pulled him into a bear hug. It was almost like hugging Jared, comforting and familiar.

 

When Gerry stepped back Sherri took his place pulling Jensen close, kissed his cheek and offered the same tight hug. She pulled away and cupped his cheek with one warm hand, frowning at the exhausted expression on his face. “You look terrible. Have you even slept at all since Jared was brought in?”

 

“No, I keep playing the information game with the nurses, but since I’m not legally a member of the family…”

 

“Son, you’re just as much family as Jeff and Megan. Who do I have to speak to, to get this fixed?” Gerry glanced back toward the nurse’s station.

 

Jensen sighed. He felt so drained.“Well, one of the nurses spoke with me earlier but wasn’t able to tell me anything, other than he was in surgery, although she offered to tell me ‘off the record’ what she could as soon as she knew anything.”

 

Gerry nodded in understanding. “Well, let’s see what they’ll tell us.” He headed back to the nurse’s station as Sherri took a seat beside Davey who was sleeping peacefully on the sofa. She smiled at Jensen as she stroked her grandson’s back in soft comforting circles and he snuggled deeper into the blanket one of the nurses had brought in for him. “You know when Jared was a baby he used to love it when I did this.” Her fingers tangled in the soft curls at the base of Davey’s neck. “Even when he got bigger he’d always ask for a ‘soft back’ as he called it.”

 

“He still likes the comfort of it, though I never knew his name for it before,” Jensen added softly as he squatted beside the sofa.

 

“I’m probably the only one who still remembers,” Sherri took Jensen’s hand forcing him to look at her. “You said on the phone you boys had a fight before this happened.”

 

He nodded, eyes glistening. “I said things…we both said things we didn’t mean, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I just… I just want him to be okay.”

 

“He’s strong, sweetheart; he’ll come though this fine.”

 

“How can you be so sure? You’re so calm…”

 

“I wasn’t calm on the plane, I was a mess actually. But I need to be strong for him.” She ran her hand up his arm and gently squeezed. “For you and Davey too, I can fall apart later.” Sherry offered him a rueful smile.

 

“He’s definitely your son. So, calm and collected when Davey was kidnapped and I was a total mess.” Jensen confessed. They both fell silent, lost in their own thoughts until Gerry returned with the doctor.

 

“

Mrs.

Padalecki

, 

Mr.Ackles, I’m Jared’s primary physician, Dr.O’Brian.” He motioned for Gerry and Jensen to have a seat. When they’d taken their seats, he focused his attention on Jensen. “Mr.Padalecki has requested that you be informed of Jared’s condition as next of kin also.”

 

“Thank you,” Jensen exhaled, eyes cast down at the floor, and hands nervously resting on his legs. He was relieved that he was about to get a straight answer at last. The gleam of the platinum band on his left hand caught his attention and he began playing with it. They’d exchanged rings not long after Davey’s safe return home, but it still felt odd thinking of Jared as his husband, when he was so much more than that.

 

“Your son…” O’Brian began then glanced over at Jensen and started again. “Jared was very lucky considering the circumstances that led to his injuries. He has two broken ribs thankfully there was no damage to his lungs. His right leg sustained multiple breaks including a compound fracture that requiredthe insertion of a number of steel pins as well as plates to hold the bones in place until they heal properly. We were concerned that there may have been some spinal damage due to his situation. A full spinal x-ray ruled out any fractures, but an MRI revealed significant swelling in the lumbar region between L3 and L4, we don’t expect the swelling to be permanent though. There were no signs of head injury either. To be honest it could have been a lot worse.”

 

“And the others were they alright?” Jensen asked fearful that he already knew the answer.

 

The creases around O’Brian’s eyes deepened as he took a deep breath, “There were no other survivors. I’m sorry; I can’t tell you anymore than that. I’ll give you some privacy now.”  
 

He turned to walk away, but paused when Jensen spoke up. “When can we see him?”

 

“He’ll be out of recovery soon. As soon as he is I’ll have one of the nurses let you know. I have to warn you though that he’ll more than likely be groggy and more than a little out of it for a bit.”

 

“Thank you for everything, Doctor.” Sherri offered.

 

Jensen stood taking the doctor’s hand in a firm grip, “Yes. Thank you.”  
 

With a genuine smile, 

Dr. O’Brian replied with a simple, “Your welcome,” before returning to his rounds.

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jared’s head felt crammed with cotton wool as he struggled his way back to consciousness, wooly like a sheep. Wooly thoughts struck him as kind of funny and he wondered how you’d shear a thought instead of a sheep when he heard voices beginning to poke through the cotton.

 

“Mom… Dad?”

 

“Right here honey,” Sherri reached out, fingers curling around her son’s hand and lifting it to her lips to press a kiss to his knuckles. “We’re here.”

 

“Are the thoughts with you?” his words were slurred and his eyes unfocused.

 

“Thoughts?” she looked at her husband confused. He shrugged and shook his head.

  
  
“The thoughts,” Jared grinned, “the wooly thoughts.” He giggled, “Got to shear ‘em, Dad.”

 

“Just your Mom and me, son,” Gerry replied.

 

“Davey?”

 

“He’s gone for a walk with Jensen; the nurses are only letting us in two at a time.” Sherri offered as she stroked his hand, carefully avoiding the cannula. “He should be back in a minute.”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jensen headed back towards Jared’s room, watching through the windows, as Sherri leaned in speaking to Jared. A smile lit up his face at the thought that Jared was awake at last. He reached the door just in time to hear Sherri say, “He should be back in a minute.”

 

Jared turned to his mom, eyes still unfocused, “Jensen? Who? No, no, no, no.”

 

“Sherri?” Gerry motioned toward the door and she glanced up to see Jensen standing there, face drained of all color. It was obvious that he’d overheard Jared’s reply.

 

“Oh, honey, no… Jensen…” Sherri started.

 

He stood there for a moment in shock, unable to believe what he’d heard. Sure, they’d fought, but…

 

Jared _still_ didn’t want to see him. Or was it that he didn’t remember him? His heart lurched and his chest tightened. Clinging to Davey, he turned and walked away in a daze ignoring Sherri’s desperate pleas for him to stay. He’d give him a few minutes. Yeah, that’s what he’d do. He’d give Jared a few minutes then go back. Jensen sat down when he reached the waiting room, absently stroking his son’s back as he replayed their fight in his head. He had to have heard wrong, _hadn’t he_?

 

A few moments later Sherri came out and joined Jensen on the sofa, her hand settling on his back in a comforting gesture. They sat like that for a few moments in silence and then she cleared her throat, “He didn’t mean it, Jensen.”

 

“He doesn’t know me? Doesn’t want to see me?” he couldn’t hide the pain in his voice. “He hates me that much he doesn’t want to remember me—at all?”

 

“Jensen, honey, he’s out of it. Between the side effects of the anesthesia and the pain medication he’s on…well, he’s talking about shearing wooly thoughts.”

 

Jensen lifted one eyebrow, “Wooly thoughts need shearing—who knew?” He shook his head. “Are you sure, Sherri?”

 

“I’m positive. He’s asleep again already … out like a light.”

 

He nodded deep in thought. That could be the reason why, he imagined.

 

“Come on,” Sherri lifted Davey from his arms. “It’s your turn to sit beside him. Gerry and I’ll take Davey back to your place for the night and bring him back in the morning. Okay?”

 

Jensen stood taking a deep breath, “Yeah, that’s fine. Thanks.” He leaned in, kissed her cheek, and then pressed a kiss to Davey’s head.

 

“Just send Gerry out, will you?”

 

“Sure,” Jensen smiled in gratitude as he walked back to Jared’s room, “Night, Sherri.” He called over his shoulder.

 

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jensen had sent Gerry back to their house with Sherri in tow and now sat shoulders slumped in exhaustion, beside Jared’s bed. The chair like all hospital furniture was hard and uncomfortable, making it all but impossible for anyone to get a wink of sleep. Not that he could have slept even if he wanted to, their argument still replaying itself repeatedly in his head. He would have never been able to live with himself if Jared hadn’t made it out alive. Folding his arms on the mattress beside Jared, he dropped his head down to rest on them for a moment. _Just_ _for a moment_ , he wasn’t going to go to sleep, really he wasn’t--

 

“Mr.Ackles?”

 

He lifted his head, eyes bleary, and blinked. _Crap_. He’d fallen asleep after all and with his contacts in again. Now they were starting to irritate his eyes. He blinked again and mumbled, “Mm Hmm?”

 

“Would you like me to bring you a blanket–maybe a couple of pillows? I could see if we have a spare cot available…” slowly the nurse came into focus as he looked up to see where the voice was coming from. “You know you’re going to end up sore in the morning sleeping like that.”

 

Jensen nodded, “Yeah that’d be great. Thanks.” Giving her a sleepy smile he yawned, “They really don’t make these for people to get a good night’s sleep —do they?”

 

“No, they really don’t. Is there anything else I can get you?”

 

“No, thank you.” Jensen replied. “Oh wait, coffee machine? I don’t think I’ll be going back to sleep straight away.”

 

“There’s one at the end of the hall, though the hot chocolate,” she offered “…much better. The coffee from that machine is disgusting. You’d be better to wait until the hospital cafeteria opens in the morning; at least their coffee’s drinkable.”

 

Jensen chuckled, “Thanks for the warning.”

 

“You’re welcome. I’ll be back in a minute with pillows—”

 

“Wait, before you go. Can you tell me anything about what happened to the other guys down there with Jared? He’s going to want to know and I’m going to need to tell him something. I know you probably can’t disclose details…”

 

“You didn’t see the news bulletins on the TV?” She pointed to the television above Jared.When frowned she added, “It was all over the evening news, so I can tell you what was released to the media. Was Jared close to them?” she glanced at Jared’s sleeping form with a sad light in her eyes.

 

“He was pretty close to Danny,” he reached out fingers curling around Jared’s hand. “They’re both from Texas, so knowing Jared they probably hung out a lot on set.”

 

She nodded, “The camera man, Pete, he died instantly, broken neck. His friend Danny though, he was crushed by part of the same pillar that trapped Jared. He was conscious to start, but after the rescuers moved the pillar…well his injuries were too much. He died in route to the hospital.”

 

“Oh, god,” he rubbed one hand over his face, thinking it could have just as easily been Jared. “Thanks.” He sighed. She just nodded and left, leaving Jensen to his thoughts. “How do I tell you Jared?” Jensen stroked his fingers over Jared’s hand. “How do I make this all better? Us better? How can I tell you about Danny? I don’t know what to do.”

 

                                                                           

ooo000ooo

  


[  
Part Four](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/198841.html)

  


[  
](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/198841.html)


	4. Earthquake

[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  
Part Four

  


Jared woke to the sound of his mom and dad talking in whispers beside his bed. “Where’s Jensen?” he tried to sit up, wincing as his ribs reminded him that they were broken, and he discovered he couldn’t move his legs. _Huh... weird…must be the meds_ , he thought. “Where’s Davey?”

 

“Lie back down, son,” Gerry gently pressed against his shoulder easing him back down. “Jensen left to change Davey’s diaper. They’ll be back in a moment.”.

 

He sank back into the pillows with a grimace. “Shit that hurt.” He pressed the button that regulated his pain meds, delivering a top up, before he allowed his gaze to travel down along the sheets. When he saw his leg elevated by the traction device, his eyes went wide. “What happened to my leg? I mean, I know what happened… but how bad is it?”

 

“They had to put in a couple of plates and a few screws in to keep the bone in place so it would heal proper. You’ve got a couple of broken ribs as well, so you need to take it easy, okay son?” Gerry squeezed his shoulder. “Just take your time and rest. Don’t try and be superman.”

 

“You try that and Tom will kick your ass, that’s his job,” Jensen quipped with a nervous twitch as he entered the room, Davey in his arms. “How are you feeling?” Jared either didn’t hear him or chose to ignore the question, Jensen wasn’t sure which, instead focusing all his attention on their son.

 

“Davey!”  
 

Jared’s face lit up and Davey started to squirm with an insistence Jensen couldn’t ignore... Jensen’s eyebrows raised in a silent question and Jared nodded.

 

“He’s okay. I’m so full of meds, I’m not feeling much…” Jared reached out, stabilizing Davey as Jensen set him down on the bed, “Hey, little guy, Daddy’s here.”

 

“Are you okay?” Jensen tried again as he settled on the edge of the mattress leaning forward to place a kiss on Jared’s forehead.Instead, Jared turned away from the kiss and Jensen’s face fell as his lips barely skimmed his head. He sat back, hurt and confused. There was no mistaking the brush off this time.

 

“Jared, honey, would you like something to eat or drink?” Sherri watched with a heavy heart, as her son didn’t even acknowledge Jensen’s attempted kiss. She realized he was still hurting from their argument, but this was heartbreaking. Determined to give them time to talk she moved to Gerry’s side, one hand coming to rest on his shoulder with a gentle squeeze. “Would you like us to see if the doctor is okay with that?”

 

“Yeah, thanks Mom, throat’s kind of dry.” he nodded, attention distracted by Davey who squirmed in his arms as he kissed the top of his head.

 

“Come on, Gerry.”  
 

Sherri slid her hand down and hooked her arm though his, guiding him toward the door. Jensen watched, grateful for her understanding, as they vanished from sight. He knew they’d left to give he and Jared time to talk, to try and discover if they could sort themselves out. He hoped they could because he regretted the argument more then he could say.

 

Well, there was no better time than the present, he thought as he took a deep breath. “Jared,” he started tongue darting out to lick at his lips nervous about saying the wrong thing. “Look…I’m…I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean any of it. I just---“

 

“You hurt me, Jensen.” Jared interrupted, tone tight with anger and even worse pain, and lifted his head eyes focused on Jensen. “You’ve taken advantage of me being at home with Davey all the time. You don’t even _see **me** _ anymore unless it’s time to eat or sleep. Even then it’s just a few quick words and you head off and crash.” An exasperated laugh slipped from Jared as he shook his head, his expression breaking Jensen’s heat. “Now I finally have something that makes me feel like ‘me’, like Jared the ‘actor’ again, and you wanna take that away?”

 

“No…God, no, Jared, it’s not like that! I was just… I was tired. The movie I’m working on sucks, hell, it’s officially worse than Devour if that’s even possible. And like you said, you weren’t home when I got there. I forgot you were still shooting the end of your movie and I over reacted.” Jensen leaned back on his heels running his hands over his face and through his hair. It felt as if each word was tearing free of his chest. “I over reacted, took it out on you, and I never meant to.”  
 

He could feel the emotion rising up in him as Jared lowered his gaze, fingers playing through their son’s soft curls. It felt as if Jared were slipping through his fingers. “You’re right,” he sighed. “I know I shouldn’t have gone off like that. Just…please say you’ll forgive me?” His eyes began to fill with tears and he brushed them away roughly. All this time he’d resisted the urge to let them fall tried to stay strong and he wasn’t going to break now. “When that building collapsed I thought I’d lost you. You don’t want to know all the deals I was willing to make just to get you back. Sam and Dean would have been proud.”

 

“So, if the crossroads demons were real…?” Jared’s voice trailed off as he settled Davey on the bed next to him.

 

Davey wriggled up to lie beside Jared and raised his arm to pat Jared on the cheek, “Da-dee.”

 

Jensen smiled at their son. “Let’s just say I would have needed the services of Sam and Dean to get me out of the deal.”He replied tone soft as he raised one hand to stroke Davey’s hair. “Jared, I have never been that scared before. Please. Tell me we’re good.”

 

There was no doubt in Jared’s mind that Jensen was sorry. He could see the pain in his eyes. With a quick nod, he cleared his throat. “Yeah, we’re good, but Jen, I _like_ that I’m acting again. We’re going to have to talk about scheduling things better so at least one of us is at home at a time. We screwed up, thought we could continue the way we did before we had Davey. We’re going to have to put our careers on the backburner a little until I’m up and around again. It shouldn’t be too long. Hell I’ll get a cast on this puppy soon and be chasing Davey around on crutches.” He cringed as said baby tried climb across his broken ribs. Inhaling, he pressed down on the medication button and lay back against the pillows, waiting for the relief to kick in.

 

“The doctor said he’d stop in to check up on you soon. How about we wait until we have a chance to talk to him, get an estimate on how soon you’ll be up and around before we get ahead of ourselves. You know I want you home again, Jared, but I don’t want you to risk your recovery either.” Jensen began pacing, his mind going a mile a minute. “Christ you were trapped for hours under a building in an earthquake.”

 

Suddenly, Jared started to giggle and Jensen glanced up in bewilderment, “That’s funny?”

 

Davey rolled over on his stomach, pushing himself to his knees, “Da-dee funny!” He turned around to face Jensen and practically launched himself at him, “Da-da!”

 

“Well, yeah, when you say it like that. It sounds like the plot of a bad movie, _Supernatural star Jared Padalecki starring in earthquake 2012_ ,” he giggled.

 

Jensen chuckled, a bright smile flashing across his face, “I think those meds are playing with your brain. You’re getting loopy.” He shifted Davey in his arms so the little guy was facing Jared, his back against his chest. “Da-dee is loopy isn’t he baby boy?”

 

Giggling, Davey sucked on his fist watching Jared with huge eyes. “Da-dee ‘oopy!” he squealed as Jared’s parents returned.

 

Sherri held out a cup of ice chips to Jared with a smile. “Here you go, honey, this should help your throat.”

 

He accepted it with a lop-sided smile, “Thanks, Mom.”

 

Sherri returned his smile, noticing the tension in the air had lessened, “You boys make up?”

 

“Yeah,” Jensen nodded, “but it’s gonna require some changes from both of us--”

 

“Ch… ch…changes,” Jared sang in his best DavidBowie impression then broke into a flurry of giggles, again.

 

“Maybe more than we thought depending on Jared’s recovery.”Jensen added with a grin. Glancing at Jared in bewilderment, Sherri frowned at his impromptu karaoke performance. “It’s okay Sherri, his meds are making him a little loopy, but you gotta admit, boring he isn’t.”

 

“I don’t think he’s feeling any pain, but I sure am,” Gerry teased. “Boy, you can’t carry a note to save your life. Jensen, please tell me you don’t let him sing to Davey.”

 

“’M not that bad, Dad,” Jared slurred before he yawned wide, eyes glazing over as the meds pulled him back into their embrace.

 

“Not that good either.” Gerry joked eyeing his son as his eyes began to droop. “Come on, Honey, I think we should let him get some rest.” Gerry held out his hand to his wife pulling her close and draped his arm around her. “Make sure you get some sleep, son.”

 

Jared yawned again, “Sure thing, Daddy-O.”  
 

He pulled up and leaned forward into the kiss from his mom.“See you later sweetie.”

 

As her lips brushed his forehead, Jared smiled, “You going to take Davey home with you again?” He reached up to ruffle his son’s hair. “Hey, baby, you wanna go home with Grammy?”  
 

Bouncing up and down in Jensen’s arms, Davey gave Jared a wide smile, “Grammy home!”

 

“We’d be glad to take him back home with us if you like.” Sherri offered, “It would give you both some time to talk with the doctor before he crashes again.” She tipped her head toward Jared, who was struggling to stay awake.

 

“Thanks, Sherri. O’Brian should be in soon and I suppose they’ll want to talk about physio.” Davey continued bouncing on Jensen’s lap until Jensen passed him into Sherri’s gentle hands. “Gonna go to Grammy, little guy? Yeah! Daddy will be home before you know it.” Leaning in Jensen pulled up his shirt, blew a raspberry on his son’s tummy, and then settled him in her arms. Turning back to Jared, he smiled. “I’ll be back in a minute. I’m just going to go downstairs with your Mom and Dad to see them off--okay?” He leaned over Jared and brushed his bangs from his eyes. “Try to get some sleep.”

 

“M’kay,” Jared mumbled, “m’sleepy.”

 

His eyes drifted shut as Jensen watched him sink back into the pillows then turned away, falling into step beside Jared’s parents as they walked to the elevator. “Did he… did he ask you about Danny and Pete?”Jensen whispered. “When I went to change Davey, did he ask about them?”

 

“No, why?” Gerry questioned, confused for a moment until the names struck a chord. “Oh, they were the other men caught down there too weren’t they?”

 

”Yeah,” Jensen nodded.

 

Gerry shook his head, “No, he wasn’t awake for long before you came back.” Pulling Jensen into a one-armed hug Gerry leaned in close as they waited for the elevator. “They didn’t make it did they?” Taking a deep breath, Jensen shook his head. “We saw a little on the news last night back at the house, but we couldn’t watch it.”

 

“I don’t know how to tell him.” Jensen swallowed hard. “How do I tell him that his friend didn’t make it out? That he’s the only one who made it?”

 

“There’s never going to be a good way to tell him, son. Just leave it be for now, unless he brings it up. Let him deal with his injuries first.”The elevator pinged as it reached their floor and Gerry stepped back to let a nurse pass him.

 

“Yeah, you’re right,” Jensen reached out hugging them both then kissed the top of Davey’s head. “You be a good boy for Grammy and Grampa--okay buddy.”   
  


Davey bobbed his head in understanding, hooking his thumb into his mouth, and waved as they boarded the elevator. Jensen waved back with a bright smile, knowing that his son was in safe hands. Gerry’s advice was sound, but he still couldn’t help wondering how long it would be until Jared decided to ask.

 

ooo000ooo

  


  
  
Jared slept until late afternoon, Jensen sitting quietly by his side. He looked so peaceful Jensen couldn’t stop himself from leaning forward to drop a kiss on the top of his head.He stirred as Jensen sat back, and offered Jensen a sleepy smile. “You’re still here.”

 

“Well, where else would I be? Too damn many hot nurses wandering around this hospital to leave you on your own.” Jensen joked.

 

Wincing, Jared moaned, “Damn, don’t make me laugh it hurts.” he held his ribs, trying to catch his breath, “You’re not DeanWinchester, since when do you care about hot nurses? I thought you loved _me_.”

 

“I do, I just don’t trust _them_ ,” he grinned, “You’re here, all vulnerable, just the perfect captive waiting for their charms.”

 

“You do know all that naughty nurse stuff is just a myth, right?”

 

“I’m not taking any chances,” he leaned forward and took Jared’s hand as his face tensed in pain their fingers locking together, “Pain back?”

 

“Yeah, but I don’t want anything yet. I’m still a little fuzzy from before.” He went to shift and frowned when his legs didn’t seem to follow. “That’s weird.”

 

“What’s weird?”Jensen gave his hand a squeeze. “If it hurts, just squeeze my hand until it’s okay again—all right?”

 

“No, it’s not pain or anything, it’s my legs. They won’t move.”

 

“Well, yeah, one of them is in traction they don’t want it moving around.”

 

“No, Jensen, I mean I can’t feel them. I thought it was the pain meds … but it’s not is it.” A look of terror swept across Jared’s face; all Jensen wanted to do was make things right, but nothing was right.  
 

Right now the swelling was pinching the nerve endings and blocking the impulses to his muscles. The doctor was optimistic but…

 

“Mr.Padalecki?”

 

Jared glanced up to see a tall middle-aged man standing in the doorway. “Yes?”

 

The man entered, medical chart in one hand and held out the other. “I’m Dr.O’Brian; I’m your surgeon.” Jared accepted his hand, shaking it, and then O’Brian turned to Jensen, “Mr.Ackles.”

 

“Doctor O’ Brian, it’s good to see you again.” Jensen clasped his hand.

 

“Jared, I’m not going to beat around the bush since you seem the kind of person who likes to be straightforward and honest. When you were brought you in last night you were in bad shape; two broken ribs and multiple breaks of both the tibia and fibula, including a compound fracture. The orthopedic surgeon that worked with us managed to set, pin, and plate the breaks, and we’re optimistic that it will heal quite cleanly. There will be some minor scarring from both the compound fracture as well as where we inserted the hardware, but in the overall scheme of things that is the least of your worries.”Flipping a page over on Jared’s chart, he cleared his throat, “I see you’re due some more pain relief in half an hour. Is that fine or would you like me to arrange that sooner?

 

“No, I think I can hold out…but—” Jared took a deep breath, since the meds had begun to wear off his ribs were throbbing, yet he felt nothing in his legs. He wasn’t sure he could get the question out without breaking down, “Why can’t I move my legs? Or feel them.”

 

O’Brian looked up from the chart. “There’s some localized swelling on your spine that’s impairing function. For now it’s causing the paralysis of your legs, but it’s a temporary situation, once the swelling subsides you should have full function again.”

 

Jensen reached out to squeeze Jared’s hand, watching as he swallowed hard, taking it all in. “Paralysis?” He felt a tremor travel through Jared at that word, and then he squared his shoulders, putting on a false front for the doctor. “So, how long is my leg going to have to be in traction?” Jared’s voice went so soft Jensen could barely hear him.

 

“We’ll have you in traction for about a week, and then you’ll start physio after that. Your PT should be by later to introduce herself. Do you have any questions? I know it’s overwhelming.” O’Brian gave him a concerned smile as he let him process the information and waited for his answer.

 

Deep in thought, Jared shook his head. After everything, O’Brian had said he was to confused to even think of questions, “No. Thank you.”

 

Jensen knew with heartbreaking accuracy that Jared had been devastated by O’Brian’s words and he could see him begin to curl into himself, not even really noticing the doctor leave the room. “Jay…” he sat down on the edge of the bed beside him, careful not to pull the bedding too tight against Jared’s injuries. Jensen heart nearly broke as he noticed the trembling of Jared’s body and faint pained sounds that were the only sound in the room.

 

“Paralyzed,” Jared spoke, “I…Jen…” his voice broke in a way that reminded Jensen of when they’d almost lost Davey. That had been the one time since he’d met Jared that he’d ever seen him that broken—until now. This time though Jensen was determined to be the strong one.

 

“Hey,” he brushed back Jared’s bangs from his face, looking into his eyes. “You’re not going to be paralyzed permanently--do you hear me? O’Brian said it was temporary… _temporary,_ Jay. I don’t believe for one second that you won’t be able to overcome this.”

 

“Overcome this?” Jared tried to pull himself up but the pain in his ribs caused him to fall back against the sheets. “‘This is not a hurdle, Jensen. It’s a shattered leg, broken ribs and PARALYSIS. You do understand the meaning of that?” Anger flashed in Jared’s eyes. “Do you GET THAT? I might never walk, I’ll never be able to look after Davey on my own while you’re off making movies, and you’ll--”

 

“I’ll what?”

 

“Never mind,” he sighed. “It doesn’t matter.” Jared closed his eyes tears welling along his lashes and a single one escaped to trail down his face. “Just… go Jen.”

 

“Jared…”

 

“GO!” He turned his face away, refusing to acknowledge Jensen’s touch as he wiped away his tear. With a frustrated sigh, he decided it might be best to give Jared some time to sort through it all.

 

“Okay, I’ll go, if that’s what you really want, but I’ll be back this evening and every other damn evening until you decide to face this.” He waited for a response and when none was forthcoming, he gathered his things walking out.  
 

By the time, he reached the elevator at the end of the hall his chest was so tight he thought he would suffocate. Closing his eyes, he tried to calm down, get a grip on everything, but it was far harder than he expected it to be. He reached out to punch the button for the ground level and then turned gazing up the hall toward Jared’s room. The man he loved more than he could voice was hurting, deathly still, and alone in that bed and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it. At least not now, but he wasn’t going to give up on him. Soon, Jared would be home with him and their son, walking again. If it was the last thing he ever did, he would have _his_ Jared back, and not the shell he’d just left behind in that hospital room.

 

ooo000ooo

  


 

“When does he come home?” the noise of the club almost drowned out Chris’ voice, as the crew prepared sound checks for the gig later that night. “I mean, he’s out of traction now, he has to be.”

 

“Yeah, he’s had physio everyday for the past three weeks. He’s stronger, but the swelling hasn’t gone down as quick as they’d hoped. He has feeling in his legs now, so there’s no nerve damage stopping him. He just doesn’t seem to want to get better.”

 

“So what are you gonna do?” Chris demanded, “Man, you can’t let him pussy out. You’re gonna have to show him tough love, dude. Kick his ass. Take him home and make him do it. Hell, tell him if his son can damn well learn to walk so can he. Don’t let him get away with it, Jensen, or you’ll end up with looking after two kids not one.”

 

Jensen sighed and he swore he could hear Chris’ eyes roll on the other end of the line. “Before you say anything… and I know you Chris, you were about to get all over me for pussying out.” He paused taking a deep breath, “I agree with you. I think that’s the only way I’m going to get through to him. It doesn’t make it any easier though--you know? He’s gone through so much.”

 

“Yeah, he sure has. I’m not denying that. You have to do this though for the sake of you both and your son, Jen.He lived damn it, when those other families lost those men, he lived. Now he has to act like it.”

 

He let Chris’ words sink in, silent and thoughtful.

 

“Jen…Jensen… you still there? Dude, I know you’re there, I can hear the squirt.”

 

“Yeah, I’m here. What if that’s it? The reason Jared isn’t fighting? ‘Cause he’s feeling guilty over being the only one who made it. Survivor’s guilt how do I fight that?”  
 

Jensen lowered Davey to the floor with his toys and headed for the kitchen.He started pulling pans out of the cupboard, setting them on the stove and turned to the fridge to pull out ground beef, onions and garlic. It would be dinner time soon and spaghetti bolognaise sounded good. “You’re right about one thing though. If he doesn’t do this, it’s going to be as if those men’s lives didn’t mean anything to him. I don’t think he could live with that either.” Pulling out a knife and cutting board, he started dicing the onions.

 

“Then keep that in mind. Keep it as the big gun motivator and bring it out if nothing else works. Cause you gotta find something to motivate him.”

 

"I could always withhold sex," Jensen quipped, trying for a little lightheartedness into the conversation as his eyes tear from the onion, at least that’s what he told himself.

 

“Yeah…” Chris’ voice held a hint of the smirk Jensen knew was on his face, “You could try, but the way you two fuck like bunnies you’d just break. Better stick to the tried and true methods, Jenny boy.”

 

Jensen busted out laughing, “Thanks for the vote of confidence man, you’re a real help.”

 

“I do what I can,” Chris retorted.

 

Jensen could hear Steve yelling at Chris in the background to _get his lazy ass back to work_ and grinned, “Sounds like your man wants you back, Chris.”

 

“Bitch you’re the married one, not me.” He chuckled, “See you later, man.”

 

“Later, dude,” Jensen hung up the phone with a smile. Chris had given him some good advice, now all he had to do was take it.

 

ooo000ooo

  


“So, Jared, you ready to go?” Pushing the empty wheelchair into the room Jensen pressed down the brake, securing the chair by the bed.

 

“What’s that for? I don’t have physio again today.” Grumbling Jared rearranged the sheets back over his legs. “I’m fed up with being poked, prodded and made to bend and stretch.”

 

“Well, I’m not here to take you to physio, you’re out of here.”

 

“What?”

 

“Yeah, Doc said you’re good to go, Jay.”

 

Jared’s face fell, a shadow of uncertainty passing through his eyes before he gave an emphatic. “NO.”

 

“No? Jay, you’ve done nothing but bitch about wanting to get out of here! Now you don’t want to leave?”

 

“I can’t leave. I’m not ready.” He set his jaw, teeth gritting in a show of stubbornness.

 

“Not ready?Jay, Doc O’Brian is pleased with your recovery. He’s releasing you to go home. Don’t you want to be home with us? Davey misses his daddy and if the doctor thinks you’re ready…” Jensen trailed off exasperated as Jared refused to budge.

 

“I still CAN’T WALK, Jen.”

 

That was it—he’d had enough. “You CAN! I’ve seen you in physio, Jay, you’re doing great.”

 

“Sure with bars to hold on to,” a snort escaped Jared as he dropped back into the pillows. “Not on my own. I’m never going to walk on my own.”

 

He wasn’t going to argue with his stubborn, self-pitying husband, Jensen thought as he crossed the room and began to emptying the closet of Jared’s things. He folded the clothes, packing them away. Stubborn ass, he thought. Why couldn’t he see the progress he’d made? Okay, so he wasn’t walking on his own yet… but the doctors were still expecting him to make a full recovery.

 

Jared watched as he thrust the clothes into the bag and sniffed in irritated disgust. “What are you doing and what the hell’s your problem?”

 

“What’s my problem? Oh, I don’t know, maybe a jackass who doesn’t realize how lucky he is to be here. To BE ALIVE! One who’s been told again and again that he’s well enough to go home and see his son, but just doesn’t give a shit enough to care that his son and his husband miss him. Or maybe that he loves—” Jensen took a calming breath. No that was one weapon he had to save for later.

 

“Maybe I love what?” Jared prodded. “Come on out with it.”

 

“Maybe you …” Jensen paused. _Think quickly--come on._ “Maybe you love the pity party you’re throwing yourself more than your family.”

 

Jared snorted. “Yeah, I just love having a nurse help me go piss.”  
 

“Maybe you do love it!” Jensen snapped as he yanked the bag’s zipper shut, the metal teeth loud in the silence that fell between them.He moved to the head of the bed, eyes narrowed in annoyance then reached out yanking back the covers. “Get up.” He hissed between clenched teeth.

 

“Excuse me--what?”

 

“I said…GET UP!” Heading for the foot of the bed, Jensen grabbed for Jared’s ankles. If he weren’t going to move of his own accord then he’d just have to make him. “You’re going to get out of this bed and into this damn wheelchair if I have to damn well carry you.”

 

“Fine!” Jared huffed sliding his legs across the bed and pushed up so he was sitting, his legs hanging over the edge of the mattress. “Happy now?”

 

“Is your ass in the wheelchair yet?”

 

The glare Jared aimed Jensen’s way would have made SamWinchester proud. After all Jared had perfected it while playing the role. “Pushy bastard,” he grunted as Jensen rolled the chair closer and held his hand out.

 

“Yeah, I am,” he acknowledged. “Now I’m standing here, _with_ my hand out, willing to help you. Davey is at home with Julie and Clif, just waiting for you to walk…” Jensen paused then charged on. “He’s waiting for _you_ to come through that door. Are you really that much of an ass that you’re going to disappoint your son?”

 

Jared looked up startled. He did miss Davey. Hell, more than he could ever say, but going home meant no more security blankets in the form of nurses and his PT. He was going to have to go back home and rejoin the world. Continue the physio exercises alone, on his own when Jensen was away at work.Going home was a scary prospect. How was he going to cope with Davey all by himself?

 

Grasping Jared’s hand, Jensen squeezed it. He’d seen the fear clouding Jared’s eyes and it was then that it finally dawned on him what was holding Jared back. It was the fear of having to cope by himself with his recovery, Davey, everything. “Jay,” his voice lowered as he tried to sooth that fear he saw bloom in Jared’s eyes, “You do realize that Julie will be there too? She’s willing to work any extra hours we want until you’re up and around again.”

 

“So now she’ll have two babies to look after?” Jared’s voice was flat. “I can take care of myself you know!” he protested but there was no strength behind his words.

 

 _Except for the part where ‘you won’t’_ , Jensen thought with a raised a brow. “No one said you couldn’t. Now get your ass in the chair.”

 

Huffing, Jared leaned against Jensen for support as he stood on legs that were shaking, and turned slow and careful to lower with a slump into the chair, “Happy now?”

 

“Ecstatic.” Throwing the bag over his shoulder, grabbed the wheelchair and headed for the door. "Ready to face the world, sunshine?"

 

Sighing, Jared nodded, "As I'll ever be I guess."  
 

   
                                                          
                                                                                                                       

ooo000ooo

 

 

  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fyxwa/)   


  
[   
Part Five ](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/198948.html)   



	5. Earthquake

  


[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  
Part Five

  


  


Julie let go of the drapes, watching them fall back against the glass. “They should be back by now.”

 

“Knowing how keen he was to bring Jared home, they won’t be far away. Come on, sit down, Julie, and stop that pacing. You’ll wear a hole in the floor.” Patting the back of the sofa, Clif smiled at her and she returned the smile grateful for his presence today of all days.

 

“Thanks, but I have to get Davey ready.He was so excited when Jensen told him Daddy was coming home from the hospital, I never thought he’d fall asleep.” Moving away from the window and toward the stairs she paused in the door and glanced back at Clif. “You’ll let me know when they get here—won’t you?”

 

“Sure thing, honey although, I’m sure you’ll hear all the commotion from upstairs. Jared…he hasn’t been easy for Jensen to deal with lately. He’s not accepting the crutches, even though the doctor says he’s confident he’ll walk again. He could probably walk with them, but he refuses to even try.” Clif snorted in frustration, “That boy can be a stubborn fuck when he wants to be.”

 

“Da-dee, Da-dee,” Davy’s voice drifted down from the nursery in a singsong. “Want Da-dee.”An even louder rattle followed his demands as he started shaking his crib, and banging toys against the bars of his wooden prison.

 

Clif grinned at the noise, “Sounds as though someone wasn’t as asleep as you thought.”

 

“I guess not,” Julie agreed heading up the stairs. “I’ll be back down in a minute.”

  
  
                                                                                          

ooo000ooo

  


 

 

A few of minutes after Julie went to retrieve Davey, the sound of Jensen’s SUV approaching, caught Clif’s attention. He wandered to the window, fingers parting the drapes as he leaned against the wall. He smiled to himself as the familiar vehicle came into view, turning into the driveway, and the garage door began to open.  
 

Clif headed for the kitchen, planning to help, but then he paused as he reached the door that led into the garage. Yes, he was their bodyguard, had been for years now, but he was also their friend and the last thing he wanted was to make Jared any more self-conscious than he already was. Jared just like Jensen were not just friends either, they were both like sons to him and he felt just as helpless as Jensen when it came to helping Jared recover, although he’d never admit it to either of them.

 

From beyond the door, he heard the SUV enter and the engine cut. Taking a deep breath, he unlocked the door and forced a smile on his face. As he started to open the door, he heard the SUV’s door open and then slam shut and he flinched. The fighting had already started that could be the only thing that had Jensen in a mood where he’d risk damaging the car.  
 

“You don’t need the chair!” Jensen screamed, as he moved around to the passenger side to open the door.

 

“God damn it! What in the hell would you know.” Jared beat at his legs in frustration. “They don’t fucking work! I CAN’T WALK! So yeah, I do need the god damn chair!”

 

“O’Brian released you, gave you crutches to walk with. He _gave_ them to you because he knows there’s no fucking reason you can’t walk all you have to do is try, but not you and damn stubbornness! The swelling went down Jared, it's gone, there’s nothing physical to stop you.” Frustrated, he stomped to the rear door to drag the wheelchair out. Shaking it open he made sure the seat was unfolded properly before wheeling it over to Jared. “Get in.”

 

Puckering his lips, Jared fluttered his lashes, “Way to make a girl feel special, Prince Charming.” Lifting his legs one at a time from the vehicle he dragged them around and slid forward enough to lower his body closer to the chair. Looking up he glared at Jensen, “A little help here?”

 

With an irritated huff, Jensen moved to Jared’s side so he could wrap one arm around his shoulders, bracing himself as he lowered into the chair. “You do know you just called yourself a princess?” Jensen smirked which only made Jared look as if he had been sucking on a lemon most of the day, “Oh, come on, it doesn’t matter how pissed you are I know you’re missing Davey. Let’s go inside, okay?” He retrieved Jared’s bags from the back, eying Jared as he wheeled himself toward the door.

 

“Yeah, I guess so.” he grumped beneath his breath. When he saw Clif hovering just inside the door, he slowed down and frowned. “Hey man, what’re you doing here?”

 

“Thought I’d hang out be part of the welcome wagon.It’s good to see you home, man. Things have been boring as hell without you around.” Moving into Jared’s space, he leaned in to clap him on the back. “Julie should be down with Davey soon. Little guy was upstairs announcing he was awake by rocking the crib so damn hard we thought he was going to shake it apart …” Clif trailed offwith a nervous chuckle. “Any way it’s good to have you back man.”

 

“Thanks, man. It’s good to be home.” Clif stepped aside with a faint smile and Jared wheeled himself inside. “So where’s my little guy?” Jared yelled as he maneuvered into the living room, up to the sofa.  
 

“Da-dee!”

 

“Davey!” arms spread wide Jared reached out to catch his squirming son as he leaped from Julie’s arms. “How has my little guy been?”  
 

“Da-dee, back! MissDa-dee!” he wrapped his pudgy arms around Jared and held on for dear life.

 

“He’s been so excited about you coming home, Jay. You have no idea.” Closing the door behind him Jensen joined them in the living room.

As if to prove Jensen’s point Davey began bouncing wildly in Jared’s lap. “Da-dee! Da-dee home again! Da- dee!”

 

Jared buried his face in the crook of his son’s neck, hiding the shine in his eyes, and squeezed him tight.“Yeah, baby, Daddy’s home again.”

 

“Dada look, Da-dee home!” Davey squealed with glee as Jared tickled his ribs. Jensen dropped the bags by the door and moved to his family across the room. “Dada, my Da-dee home again.”

Jensen swallowed hard at the joy he saw sparkling in both Jared and Davey’s eyes. “I see that, baby.” He whispered as he knelt down next to Jared.

 

“Well guys, as touching as this scene is I gotta run.” Clif smiled at how much love he saw in Jensen’s face. Maybe it wasn’t going to be as bad as he thought for his boys. “Julie, you need a lift home?”

 

“Thanks, Clif that’d be great.” She turned back to take in the happy scene in front of her, “That is unless you guys need me again today?”

 

“Nah, you go home, Julie. I’ve got it covered,” Jensen pushed up from the floor and offered her a grateful hug. “We’ll be fine—won’t we Jared?”

 

“Yeah, go on, Jules. I’m sure this one here has given you enough trouble for the day. Haven’t you, Davey?”

 

“No, dada, Da-dee, I no trouble,” Davey insisted pushing out his lower lip in a pout.

 

Jared laughed as he tightened his arms around his son, “Go on we’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

“Okay, see you tomorrow.” Julie turned slipping from the room with Clif at her side the front door closing behind them with a soft thud.

 

Silence descended with their departure and Jensen headed for the kitchen, yelling over his shoulder. “You want anything to drink before I start dinner?”

 

Panic crept into Jared at Jensen’s departure and he lost his voice for a moment. When he didn’t answer, Jensen paused and glanced back. “Jared?”

 

He swallowed hard, “Wait, you’re going to leave me alone with Davey? What if I drop him?”

 

“Then he’ll bounce,” Jensen shrugged with a snort.

 

“Jensen!” his eyes widened in horror as he yelled. _How could Jensen be so flippant about the safety of their son?_ He thought.

With a sigh, Jensen turned with a shake of his head. “Look, Jared, you’re in a wheelchair not on top of a ten story building. If Davey wants to get down off your lap and you don’t think you can put him down properly then let him slide down your legs. It’s not rocket science, dude, and you’re not a precious princess that needs to be coddled. Now I’m going in the kitchen to make dinner. You need anything you call, okay?”  
 

Running a hand over his mouth, he tried to tighten the rein on his emotions, keeping them inside. He turned away before Jared could reply and headed for the pantry, raiding it for dinner ingredients. God knew outside their son, Jared was the most important thing in his life, but if this was how he was going to act every time he left the room, Jared was going to drive him nuts. He acted as if he was helpless and Jensen knew better.

 

Behind him in the living room, Jared chose to ignore Jensen and snuggled Davey. Jensen didn’t seem to get it and that was fine, but damned if he would risk hurting his son just because Jensen was an insensitive prick. God, it was going to be a long night.

 

ooo000ooo

 

Dinner was finished, dishes in the dishwasher, and Jensen had settled Davey down for the night upstairs where he was sleeping like the proverbial baby. Joining Jared in the living room, Jensen stretched in an attempt to loosen the tight muscles in his neck. Jared had traded the wheelchair for the sofa, propped up on a pile of pillows.

 

“Any room there for me?”

 

Jared glanced up from the television, eyes unreadable, “Sure I guess.” he pushed up further on the pillows and Jensen lifted his legs, slipping beneath them, and took a seat, his lap acting as a footstool for Jared.

 

“Jensen.”

 

“Jared.”

 

They both paused and then Jensen cleared his throat. “I’m really glad to have you back home, Jay. Davey’s missed you so much…and so have I. You have no idea how scared I was that we were going to lose you. Then you were in the hospital and you avoided me for so long. It hurt man. I just want you to get better. I just want you. Walking or not. I love you.”

 

“I know.” Jared’s head lowered, voice soft, as he picked at a loose thread on the seam of his jeans, “Me, too.”

 

The silence stretched between them and for a moment Jensen thought Jared had said all he was going to say, and his temper started to flare. Here he was spilling his guts and Jared just gives him a ‘me too’? What the hell was that? Why couldn’t Jared just talk to him? For as long as they’d known each other Jared had been the talker, but now—Jensen didn’t know what to think. It was as if Jared was an entirely different man. Maybe O’Brian was wrong. Maybe Jared did have brain damage.

 

“Where am I sleeping tonight?” Jared asked in a hushed tone, one so quiet that Jensen wasn’t sure he heard him right. “I can’t get the wheelchair up the stairs, and there’s no way in hell I’m going to let you carry me so…”

 

 _What the hell is he talking about?_ _Definitely brain damage,_ Jensen thought. _“_ Jared, you’re sleeping upstairs with me like you always do.” He raised his hand as Jared opened his mouth, halting anything further his insane lover was about to say. “You can’t get the chair upstairs, that’s true. You don’t need it anyway. YOU DON’T! You have those damn crutches, and you can use those. I’ll be right beside you, ready to roll down the stairs with you if need be, but you are going upstairs tonight! Oh, and as for that _carrying_ your huge ass up the stairs—not on your life--Davey is heavy enough.”

 

Jared turned back to the television with a sigh.”Okay, fine, whatever.” He knew he was coming off as a cold, uncaring son of a bitch, but he couldn’t seem to see things through those rose-colored glasses Jensen wore.They sat there in silence until the end of the movie, Jared’s eyes slowly drifting shut until Jensen couldn’t take it anymore.

 

“Okay, that’s it.” He lifted Jared’s legs and slid from beneath them. “You’re going to come upstairs to bed. Now take these…” he grabbed the crutches from where he’d put them against the wall earlier and held them out. “You’re going to walk, however slowly you need to and we are going to go to bed.”

 

Snatching the crutches, Jared glared at Jensen as he helped him to his feet.Jared adjusted the bands around his forearms, cursing beneath his breath. “I hate these damn things.”

 

“I know.” Jensen snorted. “Now come on take it slow, I’ll be right beside you.”

 

“I’m not a damn baby, Jensen!”

 

“No? Well stop acting like one and let me help you.” Jensen followed Jared as he slowly placed one shaky foot before the other. The strain was evident on his face as he focused all his energy on putting one foot in front of the other. As he reached the stairs he hesitated, “Jen…” he choked out, face flushed from the strain.

 

“You can do it.”

 

Jared slowly made his way up the stairs, pausing to take a break every few steps. His arms trembled with the tension until he finally made it to the top. He stopped and wiped the sweat that had formed across his brow, “Fuck.”

 

“Really?” Jensen smirked, “not tonight dear--I have a headache,” he deadpanned. “Seriously you’re nearly there. Come on.”

 

Jared managed the last few steps to their bedroom and dropped to the bed with a groan. Pulling off his shirt, he flopped back on the pillows. “Oh, god I missed our bed.” He stretched his arms above his head and his spine let out a few soft pops.

 

“I missed you in our bed.”   
  


Jensen pulled his own shirt off and threw it toward the hamper, with a quick flick of his fingers he popped the button on his jeans, slid the zipper down. As the denim pooled at his feet, he stepped out of them leaving them where they lay. “I’ve waited so long for you to come home Jay, I…” Jensen trailed off as he looked over at Jared only to see him lying half on the bed, jeans still on and eyes closed. He chuckled crossing the room to finish undressing Jared.   
  


“God damn it, Padalecki, you weigh a ton.” Jensen groaned as he struggled to get Jared under the blankets. “The things I do for you.”

 

Exhausted and out of breath, Jensen slipped it beneath the covers, and rolled over to spoon against Jared. It had felt strange not having those long legs wrapped around his body as he slept. He never knew how much he’d miss it until Jared wasn’t there. He shifted across the mattress, snuggling closer to him so they were skin to skin, placing a gentle kiss against Jared’s shoulder and allowed the warmth next to him to lull him to sleep.

 

                                                                

ooo000ooo

 

 

The next couple of weeks were the hardest Jensen had ever lived through.Jared was just as demanding, if not more, than Davey. He refused to do the exercise schedule his therapist had designed for him, and he spent most of his time moping around the house, disappointed at his recovery rate. Jensen had tried to make him understand that he needed to follow the therapy schedule if he expected to recover. If anyone knew the need for it, he did, considering he’d planned on being a physical therapist before taking a detour to Hollywood. He might as well have beaten his head against a concrete wall. Jared was spiraling into a depression that he wasn’t sure he would be able to pull him out of if he continued down the path he was traveling.The only thing that had kept Jensen sane through it was having Julie as his right hand man, his support system. It was nice to have another person to talk with. If he hadn’t Jared would have had him just about tearing his hair out in frustration.

 

“Chris, I’m at the end of my rope here. Julie’s had to go out of town for the next couple of weeks and I honestly don’t know how Jared did it; looking after Davey and still having an acting career. Davey’s so full of energy and with Jared the way he’s been lately well…it’s as if I’m raising a couple of two-year olds, “ He sighed into the phone. “I’m stuck for ideas on how to get him back doing his physio exercises.”

 

Chris must have covered the mouthpiece at his end because all Jensen could hear was muffled voices, and then he came back on the line, “I just had a word with Steve. He has some free time now that he’s finished the new album. He could come over and work with Jared, help him get back on top. That is if you want him to.”

 

“That would be awesome thanks, man.” Jensen let relief wash over him.

 

“You’re welcome. Now go make sure that man of yours is up and about. Steve should be over in about an hour.”  
 

                                                                       

ooo000ooo

True to Chris’ word,Steve arrived an hour later. They stood and talked in hush tones at the front door for a few minutes before Jensen went to look after Davey leaving Steve to head into the living room.

 

“Jared, man, how you doing?” Steve joined Jared who sat slouched on the couch and patted his shoulder in greeting.

 

“I’m fine, you?” He didn’t even glance away from the television screen figuring if he ignored Steve that he might leave him alone. After all, he wasn’t in the mood for visitors.

 

“Good, album’s all finished and I got nothing but time, so I thought I’d come by and shoot the shit with you for a bit. How are you--really?” Steve settled down in the armchair across from Jared.

 

Jared glanced at him in disbelief. “How am I? Well, I don’t know. Let’s see…I still can’t walk and Jensen’s like an overprotective mother hen. Now …let’s see. All these people keep asking me how I’m doing when its blatantly obvious that I’m not getting any better and I’m gonna stay this way for the rest of my life. So, how are _you_ , Steve?” Jared spit out sarcasm dripping from his words.

 

“Wow! Who pissed in your cheerios?” Steve relaxed back in the chair.

 

“What?”

 

“Seriously, dude, who pissed in your cheerios? What is so bad that you feel you have the right to treat everyone around you like shit?” Steve shook his head, “Man can’t you see what this is doing to Jensen not to mention your son?”  
 

“Doing to them?” Jared retorted. “I’m the one who can’t walk properly. Far as I can see nothing happened to them.”

 

“Nothing…huh…right. I see. So, the fact that you’re acting more childish than Davey right now has nothing to do with the mood in this house. The fact that you won’t man up and follow the program the hospital gave you has got nothing to do with it. Even Davey is noticing your mood and prefers clinging to Jensen like a howler monkey than being in the same room with you. None of that has anything to do with your mood or what it’s doing to them. You’re one sad bastard.”

 

“Who the fuck asked you?” Jared snapped. “You don’t like it, too bad.”

 

“You’re right. No one asked me, but I’ll be damned before I allow you to go on like this making everyone around you miserable. Get your fucking lazy ass off the sofa and come into the gym with me. I’m going to help you with the exercises you were given.”

 

Jared opened his mouth, but Steve cut him off. “Don’t even think about it. Now where are your crutches?”

 

He motioned behind him to the wheelchair. “Not using the crutches. The chair’s there I’m using that.”

 

“Why?”

 

”Because, I can’t walk genius! I hurt myself trying to walk up the stairs. Jensen insisted I walk upstairs from the first night home from the hospital and now it’s worse than before.” Jared sulked.”Told him I wasn’t ready…”

 

“That’s it man…ENOUGH!”

 

Jared looked up startled. Steve had to be the mellowest man Jared had ever met, and he couldn’t remember ever hearing him raise his voice in anger to anyone.”What?”

 

Steve shoved the chair at him. “Take it and get your pussy ass in. You’re coming with me and we’re going to get you back into shape. You might like the pity party you’re throwing yourself but Jensen and Davey don’t deserve it. Now get the fuck up!”

 

Jared knew he was being an ass. He really did, but he just couldn’t shake the foul mood that had settled over him since he came home. He was scared. Pure and simple, he was scared and if he really had to be honest with himself, angry too. Angry at himself for not handling all this better, angry that Jensen had to look after him like a baby and angry that he lived.

 

Wow.

 

Okay, he was just going to have to leave that thought there for a bit. That was a little too overwhelming to even deal with at the moment, and Steve was glaring at him with a look that would pierce steel. Jared hung his head in embarrassment as he slid the chair closer to where he sat and slid into it with ease. It was nowhere near graceful but Jared was getting too good at it to be comfortable. He really didn’t want to be in the chair for the rest of his life. He started to wheel himself back to the gym in the garage, pausing to see if Steve was following.  
 

“Fine,” Jared’s voice soft and laden with defeat, “let’s go hotshot. Let’s get me walking again.”

 

ooo000ooo

[  
Part Six](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/199309.html)


	6. Earthquake

[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  


Part Six   


  


Jared had good days as well as bad, but the bad had started to overtake the good. At first, the sessions with Steve were beginning to help, until Jared pulled a muscle in his back and it sent him spiraling back down again into the whole, _I’m never going to get out of this chair_ funk.Things had been improving, and Jared was beginning to feel pins and needles in his legs more often as the feeling seemed to be coming back, right up until this latest setback.   
 

Now, Jensen was really beginning to wonder if he was ever going to get the Jared back that he’d fallen in love with. They hadn’t even been intimate since the accident. Jared shied away from Jensen’s touch more often than not. Jensen put it down to Jared being nervous that he might not be able to get hard, due to the paralysis. After waking up to Jared’s morning wood riding the crack of his ass one morning though, he quickly dispelled that theory. Jared barely slept the full night through anymore without nightmares of the earthquake haunting his sleep and Jensen often woke to him drenched in sweat and limbs flailing. Last night had been one of those nights. At least when Jared did sleep he was still the octopus he’d always been. He looked so peaceful when he slept, and Jensen couldn’t help, but reach out to brush his bangs from his face. At his light touch Jared’s eyes slowly fluttered open and he started to pull away.

 

“Don’t…please?” Jensen whispered. “Just stay?”

 

“I ca—“

 

“Yes, you can, Jared,” he reached out cupping Jared’s face and forcing him to turn back toward him. “Am I losing you?” Jensen’s voice was soft, but the quiver was unmistakable.

 

“What? No!”Jared pulled back focusing on his eyes, “what makes you think that?”

 

“Nothing much I guess, just that we haven’t done anything except kiss since you came home. You won’t let me get close enough for us to be intimate anymore.” He tried to calm Jared as if he were a spooked horse, which in a way he guessed Jared kind of was. He reached out, fingers stroking along Jared’s hip.Jared flinched, his body shifting away. “Jared, please?”

 

“I’m sorry, Jen, I’m scared. What if I can’t… you know?”

 

Jensen slid his hand along his warm skin trailing it down to rest on the hard length of his cock. “I don’t think you have much of a problem there, Jay.” Jensen offered as he gave it a gentle tug, sliding his hand up and down the shaft gently. Jared’s eyes closed as he bit down on his bottom lip moaning low in his throat. “Jen…God.”

 

“Come on Jay, gonna make you feel so good. Missed you,” Jensen leaned forward closing the distance between them as he coaxed Jared’s mouth open with his tongue, kissing him soft but insistent. “Missed this…” he continued stroking Jared’s shaft waiting for his permission to go further.

 

“Yes,” Jared exhaled. “Oh, god …Jensen…” his back arched as the desire built in intensity, “Fuck…”

 

Jensen slid his hand up, thumb over the head of Jared’s cock, tip pushing into the slit and smirked in satisfaction at the sounds Jared made. Pre-come beaded at the tip and Jensen collected it, lifting his thumb to his mouth with a moan, as he tasted what he’d missed for too damn long. “Want you so bad, Jay,” Jensen growled.

 

“Yes… oh, god, yes Jen…”

 

Taking that as a yes, he continued sliding his palm over Jared’s cock, his other hand cupping his balls rolling them, and then giving a gentle tug. That tug elicited a gasp somewhere between pleasure and pain from Jared.  
 

“Love seeing you like this Jay, at my mercy, just writhing, letting go of everything.” Rolling Jared flat on his back, Jensen straddled him, leaning in close. “Want your cock, gonna make you come so hard…you want that don’t you, Jay?”   
 

Jensen nipped at Jared’s mouth until his lips parted on a ragged breath, their tongues dueling, and the taste of Jared was intoxicating to him. He had no idea when he’d become so vocal, that wasn’t usually his style but it was making Jared lose control. He groaned as he slid along Jared’s hard body, mouth and tongue marking a trail along his sun-gilded skin.He gave a tentative lick along Jared’s shaft, half expecting to for him to push him away. When that didn’t happen he got bolder, licking along the shaft, nuzzling at his balls, and drawing them into his mouth to savor not only the taste, but the noises he drew from Jared.

 

Long fingers carded through his hair, tightening with each wave of pleasure he created. Jared‘s body responded to his every caress. Lifting his gaze to meet Jared’s , he slowly released his balls before drawing the head of his cock into his mouth, tongue curling around the head and dipping into the slit. Jared hissed and tightened his fingers pulling Jensen’s hair, “More,” Jared moaned, “need you, want you.”

 

Jensen was good with that, and he redoubled his efforts, moans of pleasure encouraging him further. He pulled back to trail his tongue down Jared’s length then back up to take him back into his mouth, and let the hardness push deeper into his mouth with each thrust. Jensen allowed Jared this, the control of depth because he needed this. There was so little he had control of right now and this was Jensen’s gift to him tonight.

 

Jared’s breath hitched as he felt his cock hit the back of Jensen’s throat and then deeper as Jensen opened his throat.”Oh, god Jensen, fuck …you’re taking it all… I’m not going to…”

 

Tightening his grip around the base of Jared’s cock, he smiled. The sharp pain of the blood flow being cut-off halted his urge to come.Jared arched up eyes focused on Jensen, his lips still stretched around his cock. “Motherfucker,” Jared groaned, “so close.”

 

Jensen pulled back, voice whiskey sweet, “Like that?”  
 

His cock twitched in Jensen’s grip at the timbre of his voice, husky and fucked out, and all Jared wanted was to do it again. “Fuck…yes.”

 

“Didn’t want you to come yet, Jay, want you inside me, want you to fuck me…”

 

Jared frowned and began to pull away “I can’t—“

 

Realizing his mistake, too late, Jensen tried to save the situation. “Yes, you can, I want to ride you.” Jensen crawled up Jared’s body like a panther. “I want to take you so deep.” he pressed his lips to Jared’s heaving belly. “Feel you inside of me.” His tongue mapped the curve of his collar bone, up his throat, and straight to Jared’s mouth. That kiss was as if they’d never kissed before. “Need it, Jared. Need you.”  
 

Jensen reached across to the bedside table and pulled out the lube. He flipped the cap and lets the gel drizzle along his fingers, tossing the bottle aside, and reaching behind himself to run his fingers along his hole, teasing with his fingertips he pressed one finger inward. His gaze never left Jared as he watched every move he made. Jared licked his lips drawing the lower one into his mouth and nibbling at it as Jensen slip that single finger in and out of his ass—teasing him with every thrust. Soon he added a second and Jared whimpered, and Jensen felt his cock bob against his back. When Jensen added a third finger, stretching himself open wide enough for Jared, a growl escaped Jared and he reached out to grasp Jensen’s hips in a bruising grip and lifted him up, “Now, you bastard…oh, god…”

 

Lining up with Jared’s cock, he lowered himself until he felt him push in. His breathing began to speed up as he slowly lowered down inch by glorious inch until he could feel the stiff curls of Jared’s pubes against his sensitive ass. “Uh, Jesus, fuck… me … Jared it’s so…oh, fuck,” Jensen babbled although he knew he should stop, but he couldn’t even think right now. Jared’s cock filled him up, thrusting, in and out, and hit his prostate with every pass. This was everything he'd missed since the accident and he prayed it was a sign that things were getting better. Jared gripped his ass cheeks, spreading him wider and thrusting faster and Jensen could feel the rush of his orgasm, vision going white at the edges with one final thrust. Jensen was drowning in pleasure, thick strands of come spattering Jared’s stomach and chest as his cock unloaded deep in Jensen ass.

 

When neither had the strength left to even breathe, Jensen collapsed forward cheek on Jared’s upper chest and his cum now layered between them, skin to skin.

 

“That was…” Jared panted.

 

“Yeah,” Jensen agreed, “it really was,” Grinning he met Jared’s gaze and kissed him again.”Have I told you how much I have missed you…this…us?” Jensen rolled over to lie beside Jared.

 

“Yeah, once or twice.” he ran his fingertips lovingly along Jensen’s chest, memorizing the swell and angle of his muscles. “I love you too Jen, I’m just—“

 

A loud crash came from the nursery, followed by Davey’s voice “Teddy, no!”

 

Jensen smiled, exhausted. “Guess our day has officially started now--huh?” He sat up and kissed Jared again before making a face. “Ugh, think I better clean up first. Dude, how long have you been saving that for?”

 

“Too damn long,” Jared smirked.

 

Jensen chuckled as he walked into the bathroom to clean up only to emerge a few minutes later with a warm washcloth for Jared, “Catch!”

 

He caught it with a grin, “Thanks.”

 

“I’m going to go check on Davey. Call me when you want to come downstairs and I’ll help you all right?”

 

“Okay.”

 

Jensen gave the doorway a tap as he walked through and crossed the hall to Davey’s room. “Hey, little guy, what you doing?” He reached down to pick up teddy off the floor. “Teddy escaped from your crib?”

 

Davey shook his head, dirty blond hair shining in the morning light through the bedroom window.”Teddy gumpy like Da-dee,” Jensen handed the stuffed bear back to Davey and watched him scowl at it. “Teddy mean.”

 

“Why’s Teddy mean? Your Daddy’s happy, baby boy, he’s not grumpy at all today--come and see.” He lifted Davey from the crib. “Want to go see, Daddy?” Jensen pulled him in close and blew a raspberry against his neck.

 

“Tickles!” He giggled and squirmed. “Okay, Dada.”

 

“Okay,” Jensen repeated, “let’s get you dressed.”

 

Jensen spent the next few minutes changing Davey then took him back to their room. “Look who’s here, Daddy, Davey wanted to say ‘morning!’ don’t you Davey.”

 

“Morning, Da-dee,” Davey put his arms out waiting for Jared to take him. His face fell as Jared seemed unable or unwilling to take him from Jensen, then his smile returned as Jared reached out to pull him into his arms.”Hey, little guy, you miss Daddy? I missed you.”

 

“Da-dee gumpy?”

 

Jared paused and then shook his head, “Not today, baby. Today’s a good day.” He looked up at Jensen and his face softened at the frown he saw there.

 

“I didn’t say anything, I got into his room and he told me Teddy was _gumpy_ like Daddy. He picks up on it, Jay. You don’t notice, but he does.”

 

Jared nodded. If he were honest with himself he had been ’ _gumpy_ ’ a lot lately, but damn it he had good reason. Steve was being an ass and pushing him with the exercises and he tired faster now than he used too since the quake. “What time’s Steve due over today?”

 

“Chris said they’d be back in town about ten so you still have a couple of hours up your sleeve. Julie should be back around the same time. Can you look after Davey for me while I go make us breakfast, he won’t be any trouble up here. Not like if he was in the kitchen with me.”

 

“Okay, you gonna stay with Daddy while your Dada makes our breakfast little guy?” Jared gave him a raspberry and Davey squealed, crawling beneath the blankets and pulling them up over his head.  
 

“Me hiding!”

 

“We’ll be fine,” he was still nervous about looking after Davey alone, but until Julie or Steve arrived he didn’t have much choice.”Go cook like a good little wife and we’ll be ready when you’re done.”Jared smirked hoping he’d covered his nervousness well enough.

 

Jensen snorted. “I’m not the girl, who was it in bed this morning that was getting…” he trailed off when he realized that he wasn’t going to win that argument. Crap, that was him, “Fine,” he huffed. “I’ll call you down when it’s done.” Leaving the room, Jensen was confident that Jared would be fine. He wasn't a fool, he realized Jared was still shaky about his limitations especially when it came to Davey, but he couldn't be prouder right now. He was humming for what seemed like the first time in forever. Maybe today would be a good day. He could only hope.

 

ooo000ooo

 

 

Jensen hung up the phone from Julie and was busy putting the eggs and bacon on to cook when a thud followed by an even louder crash echoed through the house. Davey’s shrill cry carried down the stairs like a police siren.

 

“JENSEN!!” Jared’s terrified scream followed that wail, “Oh god JENSEN! Hurry up…Davey’s fallen! I can’t reach him!”

 

Removing the pan from the stove, he threw his 'kiss the cook' apron down on the counter and headed upstairs. “Coming!” he yelled as he took the stairs two at a time to find Davey sitting on the bedroom floor rubbing at his head, tears glistening on his flushed cheeks. He was apparently unhurt except for a small bump on the back of his head, but Jared wasn’t anywhere to be seen.   
 

“Jared?” Jensen scooped Davey up of the floor, only to find Jared on the other side of the bed tangled in a heap with the covers. “You okay?”

 

“Peachy,” Jared growled. “Davey fell off the bed backwards when he decided it was like his very own trampoline and I tried to grab for him, lost my balance, and fell out of the damn bed.” Jared untangled the blankets from around his legs with a scowl.”I created more of a crash than he did. He didn’t even cry till I fell off the bed.” He looked up at Davey, “You okay, buddy?”

 

“Da-dee fell, too.” Davey slipped his thumb into his mouth and lay his head down on Jensen’s shoulder. “Da-dee, okay?”

 

Jared nodded pulling his chair over from beside the bed and climbed into it. “Daddy’s okay.”   
 

Moving across the room to Jared, Jensen leaned down for a kiss. “You sure you’re okay?” he asked. Jared nodded again and Davey offered him his thumb. It was wet, wrinkled and pale, but Davey still offered it, “Da-dee, want? I better now.”

 

Jensen smiled as Jared shook his head. “Nah, it’s okay, I have my own.” He showed Davey his thumb and put it in his own mouth, “See? All good.”

 

“Right,” Jensen smirked. “Now that we’ve got that sorted and you have your own thumb to suck on, I guess I’ll take Davey downstairs after all, while I make the breakfast. Julie should be here soon so she can take Davey for a bit.”

 

“Okay.” Jared rolled the chair to the dresser to get his clothes gathering them up and dumping them in his lap, “Awesome start to the day, huh?”

 

“Can only get better,” Jensen quipped as he left the room.

 

“Great, you just laid a curse down on me,” Jared mumbled. “That’s never a good thing…you know something’s always going to come along and fuck things up worse when you hear that on TV.” Life better not imitate art, he thought as he rolled into the bathroom to get ready.

 

                                                                               

ooo000ooo

Steve turned up at ten as promised and took Jared into the gym to start his exercises, while Chris joined Jensen in the kitchen. “How is he?”

 

“Better…today. At least last night I think made a difference in his demeanor.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” Chris offered him a sly grin “So what happened last night?” He leered at Jensen, and Jensen’s face flushed scarlet. “Dude, you got some! Way to go!”

 

“Hey! Keep it down, and why are you so invested in my sex life anyway?” Jensen hissed as Julie walked past them to the fridge.

 

“Don’t mind me boys, I’m just making Davey’s lunch.” Julie grinned at Jensen like the cat that ate the canary.

 

“Damn it, you heard us?” his blush deepened.

 

“Jensen, I’m not that naive to think that the grin on your face was put there by Jared in a good mood.” She pulled the butter from the fridge and put it on the counter. “I’m going to see if Steve and Jared want me to make anything for their lunch, too. You boys want anything?”  
 

“No, ma’am I’m fine, but thanks, I can make anything Jensen and I need.” Chris replied, “You just do what you gotta do, we’re all good.”

 

“Okay.”   
 

She headed toward the garage and came back a moment later with their order. Wandering about the kitchen, Julie set about cooking the minute steaks for their steak sandwiches. Jensen and Chris pitched in, adding the salad to save time, and made Davey’s peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She cut off Davey’s crusts and put him in the high chair by the table.  
 

“I’m just going to take the boy’s their lunch, you sure you don’t want anything?”   
 

She’d only been gone for a couple of minutes before she stormed out and slammed the garage door muttering under her breath. “Stupid goddamn… MEN!” She came back into the kitchen and slammed the plate with the sandwiches she’d made for Jared down on the counter.

 

“Julie, what’s wrong?” Stepping close Jensen stroked her arm waiting for her to open up.

 

“I know I shouldn’t let him get to me. I know he’s frustrated about his progress and everything but goddamn it!”

 

“What did he say?” Chris’ eyes narrowed. He hated it when people were disrespectful towards others and it seemed like Jared might have just crossed that line.

 

“It’s nothing really, it should be like any other day, but seriously I really didn’t need to have my ass handed to me on a plate…no pun intended for including ketchup on his sandwich. I had enough of that shit with the visit I had to make back home.” She vented. “I’m sorry Jensen, I thought with all the stuff I was dealing with before I was ready to come back to work, but Davey has kept me on my toes all day and with Jared’s attitude just then …” she sighed. “I’m sorry. I promise, tomorrow it will be better. I think I’m just jet lagged.”

 

“Julie, its going to be okay. Look, why don’t you take the rest of the day off we’ll be fine. Jared’s just being a pissy little bitch, but seriously, I’ve had enough of his attitude, too. I promise tomorrow will be better.” Jensen gave her a hug. “Chris, can you mind Davey while I take Julie home?”

 

“Sure, no problem,” Chris gave them a smile and turned to Davey. “Just you and me, my man, high five!”   
 

Davey dropped his sandwich on the tray and gave Chris a high five complete with peanut butter and jelly covered fingers. The look on Chris’ face when he looked at his goopy hand was priceless and he groaned, “Oh man, Davey, not cool.”   
 

Davey offered Chris a grin of mashed up peanut and jelly sandwich and bounced in his chair laughing. “Unca’ Piss, oogie.”

 

“And on that note, we’re going.” Jensen smirked.

 

ooo000ooo

 

Chris grabbed the cloth from the sink and cleaned Davey’s hands, mildly disgusted at how a simple sandwich could so easily turn into something resembling concrete. Not to mention it was as difficult to remove as glue. “Davey, I love you like my own, but this is gross.”

 

Despite his best attempt to stay pissed, Davey’s laughter was infectious and Chris smiled as he kicked his feet under the tray and bounced up and down, chanting “Gross. Piss, gross.”

 

Davey suddenly went still, lower lip quivering as Jared’s voice sliced through the relative quiet of the kitchen.

 

“FUCK!JUST FUCK OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE! GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKER.”

 

There was silence for a moment and Chris assumed Steve must have been trying to calm Jared, then the sound of something heavy being thrown into a wall cut through the quiet.

 

“Goddamn it, Jared you nearly hit me! What the fuck man?”Steve sounded pissed and Chris really couldn’t blame him. They just wanted to help get Jared back to the person he was before, yet all they were left with was this surly pissed off version of their previously once fun loving friend. Chris picked up Davey from the highchair and settled him on his hip as he headed to the garage. Sliding the door open he discovered Jared sitting on the weight bench his wheelchair lying in a heap by the wall, one wheel still spinning.

 

“You wanna tone it down a bit asshole? You’re upsetting your kid.” Chris pulled Davey closer to his chest and patted him on the back as he watched the little boys lip start to tremble. “Christ you can be a fucking prick.” Chris crossed the room and reached for the wheelchair righting it and sitting Davey down in the seat. He lay the chair back so that the front wheels were in the air and looked down at Davey. “Wanna go for a ride little guy? Come on let’s take this chariot away for a race huh? Daddy can have it back later.”Chris glared at Jared just daring him to protest. He didn’t, Jared just returned the glare and turned away.

 

Chris pushed the chair forwards “Say bye bye to Daddy.”

 

Davey looked up from beneath his bangs and pulled his thumb from his mouth. “Bye Da-dee.” Jared turned back to respond but Chris was already wheeling him past and out through the door. “Bye little guy.” Jared called pathetically.

 

Steve walked back to where Jared was sitting and pushed his shoulder.Hard. “What the _hell_ man? You like scaring the shit out of the kid?” Like everyone else he’d finally had enough of this crap and if Jared didn’t change his attitude, well as much as he loved Jensen, he wasn'tt going to put up with Jared’s ‘woe is me’ attitude anymore.

 

Jared lifted his gaze from the floor and glared at Steve. “NO. Of course not!!”

 

“Well then, get out of that pity party your throwing and get your ass up again. _You are_ going to relearn how to walk again Jared even if I have to light a bomb under your ass to do it.”

 

ooo000ooo

 

 

  


  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fz4kz/)   


  
[  
Part Seven](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/199626.html)   



	7. Earthquake

[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  


Part Seven   


Chris wasn’t sure just how long Jared and Steve had been in the gym since he’d taken Davey back to the living room, but he’d had enough of Jared’s attitude. If Jared wasn’t going to give up the chair then Chris would make it so he couldn’t rely on the chair anymore. Chris’ frustration at Jared’s attitude was building to fever pitch as he’d paced across the room, watching Davey’s head turn to follow him back and forth like he was at a tennis match. Hiding the chair wouldn’t do any good; Jared would just guilt Jensen into getting it back for him. So the only thing for it was to destroy the chair.   
 

Chris scooped Davey up off the floor and knocked on the door to the garage. “Hey guy’s, I’m just gonna take Davey for a drive to see if it’ll put him to sleep. You need anything from the store?”

 

Jared looked up from beneath his bangs, gaze meeting Chris’ and shook his head. Beads of sweat trickled along the side of his face from the exertion and looked hopefully at Steve. “We done here yet?”

 

“Nope,” Steve replied. “Another ten minutes, then you get to stop for the day.”

 

“FUCK,” Jared swore.

 

“Okay me and Davey, we’re outta here.” Chris slid the door closed again and carried Davey with him to the front door. “Uncle Chris is gonna strap you into your seat and we’re gonna go for a little drive. You wanna go for a drive Davey?”

 

“Go drive Unca Piss.” He grabbed onto Chris’ arm excitedly. “ go drivin’ now?”

 

“Sure are kiddo,” he opened the back door of Jared’s SUV and strapped Davey into his seat. “Ok all set?”

 

The toddler nodded and put up a thumb. “all set Unca Piss.”

 

“It’s Unca CHRIS, Davey, K-R-ISS,” he sounded the words hoping Davey would copy him.

 

“Piss,” Davey repeated and Chris rolled his eyes and sighed. “Ok, just let me get a couple of things ready and then we’ll go ok?” Chris shut the back door and went back inside the house to get Jared’s wheelchair.Carrying it back out to the SUV he placed it at the back of the vehicle and opened the back door, looking around in the toolbox to see if Jared had anything in there resembling rope. Finding a small coil that he figured would do the job he tied one end of the rope to the hitch and the other to the wheelchair, shutting the back door with a final slam.“Aint gonna be relying on this thing anymore.” Chris checked the knots and satisfied that it wouldn’t come undone he got into the driver’s seat and started the ignition. “Okay buddy let’s get this show on the road.”

 

Chris drove out of the driveway and turned onto the road he knew would lead out of town. He wasn’t planning on going far. Just far enough so that the wheelchair he was dragging behind him would be trashed beyond all possibility of repair.There was always the chance the local police would pull him over, and he knew the locals would wonder why some crazyass motherfucker had a wheelchair tied to the hitch. Thing was, he just didn’t care.

 

ooo000ooo

 

 

Chris pulled back into the driveway with a sleeping child in the back seat and something that might have once resembled a wheelchair but was now nothing more than a twisted wreck of metal and fabric. Feeling quite please with himself Chris climbed from the driver’s seat and walked around the back of the car to see what damage was done. Pleased with the result he untied the twisted remains of the chair and dumped it on the front porch of the house.  
 

Going back to the car Chris carefully took the sleeping child from the seat and placed him against his shoulder. Davey stirred, putting his thumb into his mouth and sucked on it quietly as Chris walked to the front door and put his key into the lock. Opening the door, Chris fumbled with the key and swore quietly when dropped it on the floor. “Damn it.”

 

“Hey you, wondered when you were coming back.” Steve took Davey from Chris’ arms and headed up the stairs to Davey’s room. Chris bent down to retrieve the key and followed Steve replying softly, “Yeah, didn’t mean to be so long.”

 

“So where’d you go?” Steve placed Davey in his crib and turned to see Chris leaving the room, his hand raking through his hair.

 

“I think I just did something really stupid, but I was so pissed at him for the way he’s been treating everyone. I had to do it.”

 

Steve placed a hand on Chris’ arm and gently made him stop. “What did you do?”

 

Chris shook his head. “I can’t tell you, man. It’s something you’ll just have to see.”

 

Steve followed Chris out to the front porch and whistled low and long at the wreckage. “Wow. Remind me never to get you pissed at me. You ever do that to one of my guitars and you’ll be a dead man. You don’t think that it was just a bit of over kill on your part do you? I mean…”

 

“Jensen?” Jared’s voice came from further back in the house “Is that you?”

 

“Naw man it’s just me,” Chris walked back into the living room and followed Jared’s voice into the kitchen. “How come you’re in here?” Jared was sitting at the kitchen table, crutches by his side. “Hey man, you’re using the crutches! Way to go.”

 

Jared had his classic bitchface expression working overtime as he replied. “Not by choice I assure you. When Steve and I finished my therapy exercises we came out of the garage only to find my chair was nowhere to be seen.” Jared glared at Chris. “Don’t suppose you have any idea as to where it went do you?” he added sarcastically. “Seeing as you and Davey were the last ones with it and I really doubt that my son would have run off with it.”

 

Chris could see Jared was ready for another amazing shouting match and he was just done with it all. “Yeah I know what happened to it.” Chris was bristling with barely suppressed anger. “It’s gone Jared and you’re NOT getting it back. It’s nothing more than a twisted pile of metal out on your porch. Take a look if you want. You refused to give it up so I _made sure_ you had to do it.” Chris watched as Jared’s hands clenched into fists. “You wanna hit me go ahead. Do it. I dare you. But you’re gonna have to get up off your ass and come over here and do it cause I aint going to make it easy on you.”

 

Jared looked up defiantly. “I’ll just get another one.”

 

“Well then, son, you’ll find I do the same to that one too.”

 

“Number one, I’m not your ‘son and two, what the fuck is your problem man? ‘Cause you can’t be this pissed just because I’m in the chair. **I** was in the quake remember, **I** got injured not you, not Steve, and certainly not Jensen. ME, it was ME!” Jared struggled to his feet and rested on his crutches his voice rose with his temper.

 

“Yeah it was you. You, who for the last few weeks has made everyone’s life miserable, then when we think you might be losing the big fuckin’ chip on your shoulder and becoming the guy we love, you turn all‘woe is me’ with a hate on for anyone who tries to help you.”

 

“Chris, maybe now’s not the right---”

 

“No Steve, Jared needs to get his pansy ass up, find his balls, and start acting like a man instead of a whiny bitch.” Chris glares at Jared then looks back at Steve, his gaze softening. “I’m outta here. I gotta go cool down before I do something stupid. Again.”Chris turned away and left, and Jared slumped back down to the chair, crutches dropping to the floor with a clatter.

 

Steve lets him go, and sits down at the table, picking Jared’s crutches up and handing them back across to Jared. “Sorry man, he didn’t mean it really,” Steve tried, “he’s just---”

 

“Save it Steve, He meant it and you know it.” Jared sneered. “It’s _nice_ to know how your friends really feel about you.” he snapped.

 

Steve slid his chair back from the table with a little more force than he meant to and stood, “You know, maybe Chris is right. You **_are_** a whiny bitch.” With that he turned and walked across the living room to the front door. He reached out to open the door only to have the door open and Jensen practically walk into him.

 

“Hey man, you leaving? Where’s Chris?”

 

“Chris is …” Steve pulled his hair back from the way it was covering his face and tied it back with the band hidden by the braceletsaround his wrist. He paused for a moment to gather his thoughts and calmed down a little. This wasn’t Jensen’s fault and he didn’t want to take it out on him. “Actually, I don’t know where Chris is at the moment. He and Jared had a fight and he stormed out.”

 

“Okay,” Jensen let the syllables drag out. “Now, second question. That thing on the porch. That’s not—”

 

“Jared’s chair? Yeah, it is. Chris got fed up and wanted to make sure he was going to get out of the damn thing once and for all. He and Davey kind of took it for a ride…tied to the back of Jared’s SUV. Guess he figured it was the best way to make a point.”

 

Jensen gave a wry chuckle. “Ya think?”

 

Steve smirked. “You know Chris. Never one to do things by halves.” He met Jensen’s gaze, eye to eye. “You need to go in and speak to your boy there. He’s all ‘woe is me.’ you need to try and sort him out. I gotta go find Chris. If he’s finished wanting to punch Jared in the face, we’ll be back. Maybe with a barbecue and a few beers we can put it all behind us.”

 

“Thanks, Steve,” Jensen looked around the living room. “Davey down for his nap?”

 

“Yeah,” Steve nodded. “See you later ok man?”

 

Jensen drew Steve into a hug and clapped him on the back.“Yeah, later Steve.”  


  


ooo000ooo

 

 

 

Jensen tried to approach Jared, talk to him about what had happened while he was away driving Julie home but he could see the fatigue weighing Jared down from his morning therapy with Steve. His shoulders had slumped forwards and he winced when he turned to face Jensen, fingers digging into his thighs. Jensen gathered the crutches from where they were propped against the table, holding them up in front of Jared helping him to his feet. “Come on Jay, you look beat. Let me help you upstairs.”

 

“M not tired,” Jared yawned, confirming the lie for what it was.

 

“Well, I am. I think I’m going to take advantage of the fact that Davey is napping and crash for a while. Steve said he and Chris might come back later for a barbecue so I’m gonna make the most of the quiet time. You coming?”Jensen helped Jared to his feet and slowly followed him across the room to the stairs. Jared’s steps were measured, and Jensen could see how it taxed his reserves, tremors rippled through his arms with each step, but he could see the therapy sessions were working. Jared’s steps were more confident even if Jared refused to see it. By the time they got to the bedroom he was almost asleep on his feet.

 

 

Jared reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it up over his head, letting it fall to the floor then dropped onto the bed with a hiss of relief as Jensen took his crutches and rested them against the bedside table. “Thanks, Jen.” Jared lifted his legs onto the bed and lay back with a sigh, feeling the tension ebb away from his muscles.

 

Jensen raised his eyebrows at Jared’s sudden change of mood, but wisely let it pass unremarked. He knew Jared’s mood swings were more related to his frustration than anything else. Granted, today had been one of the bad ones, but he knew he was trying. Jensen lay down beside Jared and listened to his breathing even out as he fell asleep.

 

ooo000ooo

 

 

 

Jensen woke a couple of hours later to the feel of his cell phone buzzing away merrily in his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at the message from Chris. “Waiting at the door asshole. You gonna open it or what?” Jensen smirked and looked across at Jared softly snoring on the bed beside him. Standing up he stretched and listened to his spine pop, then went downstairs to let Chris and Steve in.

 

“Monster boy still pissed?”Chris asks with a raised eyebrow.

 

“Nah, he’s upstairs asleep.” Jensen stepped aside and Chris walked in followed by Steve as they headed into the kitchen.

 

“Brought some beers. Couple of steaks, oh and I got this too.” Chris pulled out a tub of cookie dough ice cream and placed it on the counter.

 

“Steaks, Cookie dough? That your apology for Jared?” Jensen raised an eyebrow and gave Chris a wry grin.”You know it’s his favorite.”

 

“What? Fuck no,” Chris exclaimed, “I didn’t do anything I need to apologize for.” Standing behind Chris, Steve grinned and nodded, mouthing ‘yes it is’ to Jensen.

 

Jensen gave a low chuckle, “Right Chris. Of course you didn’t.” Before Chris could protest Jensen handed him the barbecue tools “You wanna take these outside and get the heat going?” Jensen paused for a moment as he heard a small voice from upstairs and the rattle of a crib. “Steve, can you take the cooler out?There are more beers in the fridge if you want. I gotta go get Davey before he shakes his crib apart.”

 

“No worries, man,” Steve moved to the fridge to fill the cooler, reaching for more beers and some food to take outside with them. “We got it all under control. C’mon, Chris.”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jensen appeared a few minutes later, Davey’s in his arms. “Steve! Unca Piss!!!” Davey squealed when he saw Chris tending to the food, turning to face Jensen he put his hands on his father’s faceand made their gazes meet.“ Hungry, Dada. We eat soon?”

 

“You want me to make you something to eat till your dinner’s ready?” Steve offered and handed Davey one of the pieces of bread and butter from the table. Davey took the bread with a grin and put his arms out for Steve to take him. “Unca Steve, Dada.”

 

Jensen took his cue and passed Davey across and grabbed a beer from the cooler. He cracked the top and took a deep pull from the bottle. “Damn that’s good.”

 

“Damn straight,” Chris added with a grin, cracking open his own bottle.

 

Leaning against the wall, Jensen relaxed as he watched Steve pull a couple of toy cars out of his pocket, giving them to Davey to play with. His son accepted them excitedly, the bread and apparently his hunger forgotten.

 

“I’m gonna go see if Sleeping Beauty is awake yet. I’m surprised the smell of the steak hasn’t woken him up already.” Jensen pushed away from the wall and placed his beer on middle of the table. “You guys need anything from inside?”

 

Both men shook their heads and Jensen went inside.

 

ooo000ooo  


  
[  
Part Eight + Epilogue](http://winchesterxgirl.livejournal.com/199830.html)   


 


	8. Earthquake

[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003fwx35/)

  
Part 8 + Epilogue

Jared looked up, sleepy and tousled as Jensen came into the bedroom and sat by him on the bed.

 

“Hi,”

 

“Hi,” Jared echoed. He reached up and grabbed Jensen’s hand drawing him to where he lay. Jared rolled on his back, pulling Jensen down and maneuvering him so that he was sitting astride Jared’s waist.

 

“So,” Jensen ground his ass down over Jared’s cock, “I see your up.” He leaned forwards and met Jared’s lips in a kiss. It was slow and gentle and he lingered in the moment, Jared all sleep-warm and mellow.

 

“Yeah,” Jared nipped at his bottom lip playfully and pulled back. “I’m sorry for before, Jen. I was an asshole to everyone. You think Steve and Chris’ll forgive me?” He looked away from Jensen, embarrassed by his earlier mood .

 

Jensen wriggled over Jared’s cock and Jared groaned, the friction amping up his desire. “Agh Jensen, fucking tease.” He reached for the button of Jensen’s jeans and pulled down his zipper, his fingers tangling in the crisp curls around Jensen’s cock as he took it out. Jared slid his hand up and down the shaft a couple of times before allowing his thumb to slide across the top, listening to the moan it elicited from Jensen. Jared paused mid stroke and Jensen whimpered. “Where’s Davey?”

 

“Downstairs with Chris and Steve.” Jensen bucked up into Jared’s hand, silently urging him to continue. “Was actually…” He paused as Jared’s thumb made another pass over the head of his cock. “actually the reason that I came up here. They’re cooking barbecue.” Jared placed one hand on Jensen’s hip and pulled him forward, close enough to slide his tongue across the head of his cock and felt Jensen’s answering shudder. “You think we have time to take care of this little problem of yours before dinner?”

 

“Yeah,”Jensen’s breath hitched and he nodded, his voice whiskey rough with desire. “Yeah, c’mon Jay.”

 

Jared pulled Jensen closer so that he could take him deeper, tongue trailing along the underside of his cock, the vein pulsing with Jensen’s heartbeat. Jared couldn’t help the moan that escaped his throat when Jensen thrust in further. “Mm, Jen,” Jared pulled back and dipped his tongue into the slit, eliciting an answering moan from Jensen. He reached for Jensen’s hand and pressed it over his cock, the denim covering it adding to the friction as Jensen palmed him through the material. “Want you.”

 

Jensen arched up as Jared drew him back in and he could have sworn Jared was trying to suck his brains through his cock. “Want you too, just let me ---“

 

“No, Jen, I want _you_ to fuck _me_ , been so long…need it”

 

“You sure? I mean, this morning was awesome don’t get me wrong,” Jensen added hurriedly.

 

“I’m sure,” Jared dug his fingertips into Jensen’s hip and gave one last pass over Jensen’s cock before he released it and felt the slap of its weight as it fell to his chest. Jensen moved slowly off Jared’s body, his cock giving a twitch in protest at losing the attention as Jensen instead pulled Jared’s jeans from his hips, dropping the denim into a pool on the floor.

 

Jensen reached into the top drawer of the bedside table and pulled out the lube, the cap letting out a loud snap as he opened it and poured some over his fingers. Jensen slid down the length of Jared’s body, leaving a trail of gentle nips, little bites along his abs and the cut of muscle above his groin. The smell of Jared was intoxicating, musky and dark. Jensen couldn’t help himself, and he gripped Jared’s cock bringing it to his lips and tasting the head, the salty precome beading at the tip. He dipped his hand lower, his fingers sliding along Jared’s ass, slicking his hole with the lube covering his fingers. “You okay Jay?”

 

“Yeah, do it,” Jared arched at the touch of cold lube and hissed as Jensen pressed one finger in, working him open before adding another till he was ready. Jensen managed to hit Jared’s prostate just before he withdrew them eliciting a deep moan from his lover. “Lie on your side Jay, let me make it easier,” Jensen whispered in his ear as they adjusted their position on the bed. Jensen spooned up against Jared placing sharp nips on his shoulder, marring the perfect skin beneath with little bites he knew would leave purple marks later. He lifter Jared’s leg and pressed his cock against Jared’s ass, feeling the tight pressure as his cock slid inside, his body flush against Jared’s. “Move Jen, oh god, please move, feels so good.”

 

They fell into a rhythm, Jensen’s cock thrusting hard and deep, his body covered in a fine sheen of sweat as Jared lay in Jensen’s arms his body moving with the force of Jensen’s thrusts. Jared gripped his cock, stripping it hard and fast as he felt his orgasm building. “Jen. Oh fuck, Jen… gonna, I gotta—“ Jared came with the force of a freight train, his body jerking with each pulse of come as it covered his chest, his ass clamping down on Jensen’s cock inside him.

 

Jensen hissed with the feel of Jared tightening vice-tight around his cock as he came. He followed immediately, cock pumping into Jared feeling as though it had a never-ending supply. “Fuck… Damn, Jay…” Jensen panted as he rested his forehead against Jared’s shoulder. “That was…”

 

“Yeah,” Jared smiled and pulled Jensen’s hand to his mouth, gave it a kiss. “Fuck.” Jared gave Jensen’s hand a squeeze. “You think they heard us downstairs?”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Chris pulled the last steak off the grill and added it to the plate on the table. “Either Jared’s sleeping like the dead…” Chris deadpanned, “or Jensen’s up there giving him some therapy of his own.”

 

_“Jen. Oh fuck, Jen… gonna, I gotta—_ ” __

__

 

_“Fuck… Damn, Jay…”_

 

Steve grinned back and nearly let out a whoop as their voices carried down on the breeze. “Think you might be right, man.”  
 

Davey looked up at Steve and Chris as he heard his Dad’s yell out with a puzzled look on his face, but seeing that the grown-ups seemed happy and not mad he went back to driving his cars across the table. One of his cars moved little too close to the edge and fell to the floor with a crash. “Fuck…Damn.”

 

Both Chris and Steve turn their heads, looking at Davey in disbelief, and Steve laughs with a shake of his head. “Those boys are gonna have to watch what they say.”

 

ooo000ooo

 

Jared and Jensen made it downstairs a few minutes later, Jared still trying not to wobble too much on his crutches, Jensen’s hand on the small of his back reassuringly. “Hey.” Jared’s voice was quiet, still embarrassed by his outburst earlier and not sure of whether his friends had forgiven him.

 

“Hey,” Chris replied, he turned back to take the last of the food off grill, not giving anything away with his tone, and placed the plate on the table.

 

A smile twitched at the corners of Steve’s mouth and he pulled the dishtowel from Chris’ pocket and slapped him across the ass with it. “Come on, you ass, you know you’re just jealous that I didn’t make you scream like that last night.”

 

Chris gave a guffaw when he saw Jared nearly choke on his own tongue. “You heard us?”Jared’s face went scarlet. Jensen’s blush made them matching set and Steve pulled out the chair next to him for Jared to take. “not just us…” he motioned to Davey sitting by Steve’s feet.

 

Feeling their eyes on him Davey looked up from his game with the cars at at the grownups surrounding him. “ Da-dee!” he stood up and held up his arms. “fuck damn.”

 

“Davey!” Jensen crouched down next to his son, and tuned him so that they were face to face, “Those aren’t very nice words, you shouldn’t use them.”  
 

“You said, Da-dee said too.” Davey’s bottom lip began to tremble.

 

“I know we did. But we shouldn’t have said them either. Tell you what. You want to make a deal?”

 

Davey nodded and poked at the wheel of his toy car as if it was the most fascinating thing ever, keeping his eyes down.

 

“How about we make a swear Jar. If daddy or I say a bad word we have to put money in the jar. Then when the jar is full you get to keep it.” Jensen knew Davey didn’t understand the concept of money but he did like the shiny coins. “And if you hear Uncle Chris or Uncle Steve say a bad word they have to do it too, okay?” He gave Davey a little poke on the belly and Davey giggled. “Okay Daddy.”

 

Jared watched them with a shy smile,“Now that that’s all sorted, who’s hungry?”  


  


ooo000ooo

  


 

After dinner they all headed back inside and Jensen collected the dishes to stack into the dishwasher. Jared sat quietly at the table, picking at the tablecloth and Jensen was left wondering where the happy Jared from before seemed to have gone. He puts the last of the dishes in and closed the dishwasher and set the cycle, then leaned back against the counter. From where he was standinghe could see into the living room and watched Steve as he sat on the sofa and tuned his guitar, the sounds subtly changed till they satisfied Steve’s ear and he stopped. He began playing a new song, a soft melody he’d been toying with.

 

Davey had been sitting on the floor playing with Chris and his new cars until being mesmerized by the music, then he pushed himself up and toddled over to where Steve was sitting. He began to do that bouncy dance thing that babies do, laughing and clapping his hands and Jensen couldn’t help but grin at him. Davey turned around and looked at Jared with a smile “Davey dance, Da-dee! Davey dance! Da-dee come dance too?”

 

Jared looked up, pulled from his reverie and tears started to well in his eyes. Jensen had no idea know why but that seemed to be the final straw and tears that Jared’ had kept in since the accident escaped in a flood. Davey toddled over and climbed into his lap, tiny fingers wiping away his tears, “Is okay, Da-dee. It not hard to dance. Davey can, so Da-dee can too.”

 

Jared tightened his arms around his little boy and buried his face into Davey’s neck. “I will baby boy, I promise.” His tears developed into gut wrenching sobs and Davey kept patting him on the back softly murmuring “is ok Da-dee.” Jensen stepped in close to crouch by Jared at the table and gently took Davey out of Jared’s arms. “Jay?” He set the little boy back on the floor and Davey looked up at his family with big wet eyes. “Da-dee okay, Dada?”

 

Jared’s sobs got a little softer and Jensen was positive it was only for Davey’s sake, he nodded. “Yeah little guy, Daddy’s gonna be okay.” Jensen called out for Chris and he handed Davey over to him “Can you and Steve take Davey back to your house tonight?”

 

Chris gathered Davey up and hugged him tight, planting a kiss on his head, “Sure man, you just make sure you call us and let us know how things go, okay?”

 

Jensen nodded and drew Jared into his embrace. He places his hands on either side of his face and looked into Jared’s eyes “You’re gonna tell me what’s going on in that head of yours okay, but first I gotta go say bye to Davey.I love you, Jared and this has gone on long enough. I’ll be back.” Jared nodded and almost curled into himself.

 

Jensen followed Chris and Steve out to their truck, stopping by Jared’s SUV to get Davey’s babyseat and diaper bag. He handed them to Chris and watched as he anchored the seat into the truck before placing Davey into it. “Don’t worry Jen, Davey’ll be fine with us for the night, wont you Davey?”

 

“Okay, Dada?” Davey looked at Jensen and watched his face as though he was trying to really see if his daddy was alright.

 

“It’s okay, Davey, you go have fun with Uncle Chris and Steve and we’ll see you in the morning.” Jensen leaned into the truck and gave him a kiss.  
 

Chris turned to Jensen, concerned “You take care of your boy; we’ll look after the squirt.” Jensen nodded and husked “Yeah, okay man.”

 

Steve walked over to Jensen and pulled him in tight for a hug. “You need anything, you call us.”

 

Jensen smiled “God, you’re both like my mom. Get out of here.”Steve cuffed him over the back of the head “Asshole.” and got in the passenger side of the truck.   
 

Jensen tapped on the roof and turned to walk back to the porch and waved as the truck rumbled out the drive.

 

ooo000ooo

 

“Jared?” Jared hadn’t moved from the table, and Jensen pulled him into his arms. “Tell me?” He tightened his embrace and Jared started to speak.

 

“It’s been eating me alive.” He paused and Jensen was itching to ask him what ‘it’ was but he knew the best way to go was to let Jared tell him at his own pace. “First thing I remember was the throbbing pain. Then the cloying dust. It was thick, heavy. In my mouth, my nose.” Jared took in a deep breath as if he was trying to fill his lungs with air, and Jensen knew he was reliving it all over again.

 

“Then the sounds. Crying, moans of pain. I couldn’t move, couldn’t see.” Jared whimpered as the memories flooded back in a rush. He’d tried to set them aside. Forget them, but it had been impossible.“When I tried to look around for the others I couldn’t move. I wanted to get up and get out of there, but my ribs, the pain… Jensen, I couldn’t help. Danny, he was, his breathing sounded _wet_ and the room… Jensen, we fell into the morgue. _The morgue._ I thought it was the last thing I was ever going to see, and Pete, he had been standing by Danny, but we couldn’t find him.” Jared paused for a breath, “Danny was getting worse. I could hear him and I knew he was bad. It sounded like he was drowning, there was like this gurgling sound, and I tried to keep him talking to me. Why did I try to make him talk? What if that made him worse?”

 

“Jared…” Jensen started, but Jared shook his head.  
 

“No, let me finish. I can’t …”  
 

 

Jensen nodded and waited for Jared to continue.

 

  
“I called for help, but I don’t know if anyone heard me the first time. My voice sounded so loud and when I shouted more rubble fell. I was scared I was going to bring more of the building down on us. I guess I must have passed out because I remember waking up to Danny calling my name. He … he sounded weaker and his breathing was short and shallow, but it still rattled. I told Danny that I’d call for help. I had to help him. How could I have fallen asleep? He needed me! Then,” He took another breath, “I saw his face. When the rescue guy came through the hole I thought we’d all make it you know,” Jared looked up at Jensen’s face, searching for something; he didn’t know what for sure. Disgust? That Jared had failed his friend or contempt for…for what he didn’t know. All he knew is that he didn’t deserve to be here when his friends weren’t. What made his life more important than theirs?

 

Jensen could see where this was going, “You think you didn’t deserve to make it out don’t you? You can’t really believe that it’s your fault. Jared?”

 

“They had to move _me_ first Jensen. They had to move me to get to _Danny._ I was in their way and every precious second counted. He died because they couldn’t get to him.”

 

“Jared, he died because the pillar that fell on _you_ also fell on _him_. But where it pinned your legs, it crushed his chest. Jared, it’s a hard truth but while he lay there under the rubble it was actually prolonging his life. I know you don’t believe it but, it was restricting his blood flow to his damaged organs. When they lifted the pillar they discovered he had a sucking chest wound. Air was mixing with the blood from where a pipe had punctured his side; I’m only guessing but that might have been why his breathing sounded wet.” Jensen wiped the tears from Jared’s face and kissed him. “You gave him comfort by talking to him Jay. You made his last moments bearable because he had you to keep him thinking of other things.”

 

“I still get nightmares you know. It’s all I can do not to choke up when I have to go to my appointments at the hospital. I keep seeing Linda vista and the rubble, I see…” he closed his eyes and remembered being pulled to the surface in the basket, and one of the nearby paramedics talking. “When they brought me to the surface I overheard one of the other paramedics talking about Pete. Asking how much longer it would be before the coroner got there for Pete’s body. That was the first time I knew for sure he didn’t make it. Then…” Jared’s voice wavered. He took a deep breath and continued. “when I got to the hospital I was in and out of it a lot, but I remember one of the nurses saying that I was the only survivor. I thought they must have been wrong, I was certain of it. I had myself convinced that he was in the hospital and that he was just in the ICU. Then one night it was late, my meds hadn’t kicked in and I couldn’t sleep. I turned on the TV and there was some gossip show on talking about cursed movies, and they mentioned the quake. The dead.”

 

“I always wondered why you never asked me about Danny. I guess I just figured you were trying to deal with it in your own way and you’d say something when you were ready. Why didn’t you tell me? Jay, you’ve been suffering with survivor’s guilt all this time…”

 

Jared shook his head. “I don’t know. I don’t even know why I’m letting it all go now. You’ve all tried so hard to help me and I’ve just been an ass. I retreated into myself thinking if you left me then I’d be safe from having to feel. If I drove you all away then I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of losing someone again. It makes no sense. I know that, and Davey… I couldn’t see what it was doing to him. I was relieved when he wanted to be with you because I was scared I wasn’t able to take care of him. I want to take care of him Jensen. I do. When he came over to me and told me I could dance, I saw the blind faith he has in me. He doesn’t care that I’m not walking like I used to, because all he cares about is that I’m here, with him.”

 

“That’s all we want Jay. To have you back, the real you. Not just the broken pieces of you that were left.”

 

“Will you come with me to the hospital…”Jared felt his throat close over as he said the word ‘hospital’ and he swallowed hard. “to see the doctor? I think I need to see someone that can help me finally move on.”

 

Jensen met his eyes and saw hope in them for the first time since the accident. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

 

 

EPILOGUE  
                                                                                                      six months later

 

“Jensen? JENSEN? Have you seen my shirt?”

 

“Which one?” Jensen called back. Davey squirmed out of Jensen’s grasp and he let out a heavy sigh as the little escapee took off down the hallway, running into their bedroom wearing only his t-shirt and hoodie. “Davey, come here you need pants.”

 

“No, Dada.” he giggled, and ran into the bathroom where Jared was trying to tame his wild hair. He grabbed Jared’s leg and clung on like a howler monkey, letting out a scream when he saw Jensen follow him in.

 

“Whoa, little guy, careful okay? Daddy’s still not too steady when he hasn’t got his cane.” Jared grabbed the vanity for support.

 

Davey gave another squeal as Jensen tickled him and he let go of Jared’s leg. “Okay Daddy.” Jensen lifted him up and blew a raspberry on his backside “Pants boy.” Davey wriggled again as Jensen lay him down on the bed and feds his legs through the holes of his ‘big boy’ pants before he pulled up his tracksuit pants.

 

Jared leaned heavily on his cane as he walked out of the bathroom. “It’s the one you bought me last week for good luck remember?”

 

“It’s in the wardrobe.” Jensen patted Davey on the bum and watched him as he ran back to play with the toys in his room. He moved up behind Jared and wrapped his arms around his waist, and pressed a kiss between Jared’s shoulders.

 

Jared turned in his arms and grinned. “Gonna wish me luck?” He reached in the wardrobe and pulled out the shirt “You know, it’s kinda hard to put a shirt on with your arms around me like an octopus. Not that I’m complaining.”

 

“You’ll knock em dead, Jay. The role was made for you.” Jensen kissed him and stepped back so that Jared couldn't put his shirt on. He watched Jared get ready, proud at how far he had come these last few months.  
 

It’s not perfect, their life. Jared still had difficulty walking with the cane and sometimes looking after a little whirlwind in the shape of a boy could be taxing to say the least now that they were both working again. Their friends picked up the slack where they could and Julie was there for them too. But it’s their life, and Jensen wouldn’t have it any other way.

   
                                                                                                            

END

 

  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/winchesterxgirl/pic/003g0hea/)   


  



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